Sins of Forgotten Love
by Twin-Kitten
Summary: Set after Thor2. Loki/Sigyn, plus backstory. This is my version of what Loki's future should be. I really have no idea, these characters have run away with the story. Loki and Sigyn love and flashbacks, and repairing relationships.
1. Whatever our souls are made of

Set after Thor: The Dark World... There will be spoilers.

I started this story with the idea that "the Avengers need help from the one person that cannot help them. Loki. So Thor brings the one person who knew Loki best, his wife Sigyn. Only to find out that Loki is not as they thought he was." But then the story decided to go it's own way, and I have no idea what is going to happen. Right now it is a bunch of back story and character development for Loki and Sigyn. I completely cut the Avengers out.

I imagine Sigyn looking like the cover picture, a brunette Amanda Seyfreid. I originally had her eyes as golden, but after looking at the picture a little more, I think I like them that silvery blue color.

There will be flashbacks and Loki will be a little ooc in his younger self, Pre-first Thor movie and childhood. There isn't much known about Sigyn, so I will use what I know and try to make well-informed deductions and creative links. Let me know your thoughts. Sigyn might start out a little meek, but... Hell, she is married to Loki. You don't think he would marry a meek little mouse do you? Give her a little time to grow if you think she is a little washed out. If you google Sigyn there are all kinds of theories about her and ideas, but I found a really cool website that talks about her hidden strength, and I'm going to try and focus on that type of interpretation.

##############Whatever our souls are made of, his and mine are the same.#####################

Sigyn walked through the gates of the palace. Called to the hall of the All-Father for an audience with Odin. She had come from the country estate she had been living in for the past 4 years. Since Loki's betrayal of Asgard, she had exiled her self to the home. This was her first time in the capitol city since then, even when Loki had been imprisoned, she had not set foot through the golden walls nor laid eyes on the palace.

Now she felt the eyes of the All-Father's court on her, watching her. It was as if blood were on the snow and the wolves were circling. After her husband's actions, no one trusted her. The only one who had, Frigga, had died only days earlier in the attack. Sigyn was truly alone now.

Standing before the large double doors, refusing to sit as small groups walked past, whispering behind their hands while their eyes traveled over her, Sigyn thought of Loki. And how things had been.

_Sigyn stood the grass of the royal courtyard, blades tickling her feet and strands of a weeping willow stroking her hair as she looked at the sky. There was a sound, and she turned. Loki sat on the stone bannister of the veranda, watching her._

_"My Lord," She laughed, moving out from the curtain of the willow. "How long have you been there?"_

_"Long enough to gaze on your thighs." He smirked, giving his characteristic crooked answer. He must have been watching her since she took off her shoes._

_Shaking her head in amusement, she stopped on the grass once she was out of the tree's embrace._

_His eyebrows rose. "Will you not come to me, My Lady?"_

_"I will not, My Prince." She turned away from him, tucking a curl behind her ear before holding her hands behind her back, strolling slowly down a path._

_She missed the determined look on his face when he slid off the banister and strode toward her. He was quickly next to her, mimicking her pose and pace as they walked the gardens. "Lovely Sigyn, when shall we marry?"_

_She laughed, her face thrown up to the sun. "Your flattery is appreciated, My Lord, but we will never wed. I am betrothed to Theoric(*1), and we will marry once he returns from war."_

_He shook his head in disappointment. "If he had twice his own intelligence he still would not be worthy of you." He caught her hand, making them both stop on the path. Loki brought her hand to his lips but didn't kiss it, instead letting his next words wash over her skin. "I would have married you and never left your side." Finally his lips touched her smooth skin, brushing back and forth in a non-traditional kiss._

_Sigyn's breath caught in her throat. Suddenly the distance between them seemed too small, as if his green eyes were pulling her silver ones in._

"_Sigyn!" Frigga's voice cut through the tension between them and Loki dropped her hand while she took a step back out of propriety._

"_I am here, My Queen." Sigyn's voice was light as she caught her breath, moving towards the queen._

"_Oh, yes. Loki, what a surprise to find you here in this sedate setting. Shouldn't you be causing trouble with Thor?" Frigga tucked Sigyn's hand into her elbow, patting it in a motherly gesture. "Come along, dear, we must get to your lesson."_

_Sigyn nodded, but before they could step away, Loki caught a curl of her hair, twisting it around his finger. "Until we meet again, my lovely Sigyn, I shall be thinking of ways to sway you."_

"_Your pardon, My Prince, but I will not be swayed from my commitments." She tugged away from him and continued to her lesson with the queen._

True to his word, that hadn't been the last time Loki tried to woo her from her betrothed. Then they received word from the battle lines that Theoric had died, and Sigyn mourned for months. When she finally returned to court, Loki redoubled his efforts to cultivate her affections. Successfully.

"_Why do you want me for your wife?" Sigyn posed the question coyly, brushing a soft petaled flower against her neck as she looked out over the sea. She sat on the beach below the rainbow bridge, her bare feet partially sunk in the sand._

_Loki lay in the sand near her, lounging like a hedonistic roman statesman, propped on one elbow. "I find you to be many things; intelligent, clever..."_

_She laughed. "Those are the same thing, My Prince!"_

"_I disagree. Intelligence is knowledge, cleverness is the ability to use knowledge." He shrugged before giving her a wink. "You are beautiful and protective of those you love. You are also witty, and I find you amusing. You are kind and truthful, and have never thought of me as second to Thor."_

"_Why would I think you second to Thor?" And he loved her all over again. She couldn't even comprehend people thinking of him as a replacement should anything happen. Thor was not first in her heart, and nothing she did was in pursuit of him._

_He sat up and took the flower from her hand. Silently casting a simple spell, he tapped it on her nose, making small golden lights shower over her face and catch in her hair, leaving tiny glowing sparkles. She laughed again, and when she looked at him again he was sitting facing her, legs folded next to her, with one arm stretched over her legs and braced on the other side of her. His hand palmed her cheek and her breath caught as his face hovered only inches away._

"_My Lord?"_

_He grinned wolfishly. "I will have you say my name before I kiss you."_

_Her voice dropped to a whisper, as if they were sharing a secret. "And if I do not?"_

"_Then I will enthrall you until you shout to all of Asgard that you are mine." He inched closer, his strong nose brushing hers._

"_Do you think you are capable of that, My Prince?" Her voice taunted him with the unspoken refusal to say his name._

_He smirked. "That and more, sweet Sigyn."_

"_What shall I say?" She whispered as his mouth hovered less than an inch from her skin._

_Using his grip on her jaw, he turned her head slightly, moving his mouth down her neck, not close enough to touch but close enough for her to sense him on her skin. "Say you will wed me. Say you will romp in my bed and carry my children." He exhaled on the skin joining her neck and shoulder, inhaling as he traveled back up again. "Say nothing but my name and I will worship you."_

"_My Prince..."_

_His mouth hovered over hers again, and she tilted her chin up, but he grinned and avoided her. "Say my name."_

_Sigyn licked her lips, watching Loki's eyes darken. She had some sort of feminine power over him, and as much as she wanted to experiment with it, he also had power over her. "My Lord Loki..."_

_She lifted her mouth to him, compliant for his kiss, but his jaw clenched and he denied her again. "Just my name Sigyn. I may set Asgard ablaze if you do not." His green eyes were glowing brighter than the bifrost with their heat._

"_My..." She swallowed, licking her lips again, making him growl in warning. "My... Loki."_

_Suddenly he was kissing her, her hands coming up to cup the sides of his jaw as he slanted his mouth over hers. "Your Loki. I like that." He nudged her face with his, tilting her mouth up as he laid her down in the sand._

_One of his hands settled on her waist, while the other propped her head out of the sand. Nibbling her lips, Loki trailed kisses over her cheek and down her neck. Her back arched and he groaned against her collar bone._

_The sound of a large carriage rattled nearby, the sound jolting her and she scrambled out of his grasp. He jumped up to follow her but she held out a hand in warning. They stood on the beach, a few strides from each other. "My Lord, if we are caught in this manner..."_

_He grinned. "Then you would have to marry me."_

_Judging by her expression that was the wrong answer. "I must return home, My Prince." She grabbed her shoes and ran down the beach, faster than he had thought she could._

That was their first kiss, but not their last. It soon became common for them to sneak out together after dark. Their relationship was secret for months until she agreed to wed him. Asgard was shocked when it was announced. The speed of the nuptials had everyone convinced that she must have been pregnant.

Finally the guards opened the doors and she walked confidently through the almost empty room. Reaching the edge of the platform, she spread her skirt while dropping into a deep curtsy, averting her eyes in deference.

Odin said nothing until the guards closed the doors and they were left alone. "Lady Sigyn, you are more lovely than last I saw you."

"Thank you, My King." Her head remained bowed, awaiting his permission to rise.

Loki looked down at the young woman in front of him. He had waited a long time to hear her call him 'Her King.' She was more beautiful than ever, her curling mahogany hair had become longer and richer in the intervening years. Her body had filled out from the Asgardian form of puberty, and unlike many of the women in court, she was hourglass shaped rather than straight and thin. She was graceful, with long limbs and a presence that always brought him a feeling of calm. Even now she held the curtsy without wavering.

"You may rise." Loki was disappointed that he had to wear the illusion of his father to see her like this. If Odin had given him the throne from the beginning, Loki would have had Sigyn call him king a thousand times in a thousand different positions. Oh, how he would have her cry out for him. He still desired her with all the strength of his youthful passions, and loved her with the new appreciation of a wiser heart. He would have had his own princes and princesses from her body by now. Another reason to curse Odin.

"Do you know why you have been called here?" Odin's voice echoed through the chamber.

She still would not meet his eyes, which chafed him. "No, My Lord." He wanted to see her silver eyes looking up at him.

"You never visited your husband while he was imprisoned here." Loki hadn't meant to say that. But now that he had, he wanted to know. He turned away from her to look out the large windows. "Were you so fickle in your devotion?"

He could see the confusion on her face, her answer slow and thoughtful. "No, My King. I did not think it wise to visit. Loki betrayed Asgard. Many thought me an accomplice to his plans, and attempts were made on my life. I had to move from the city for my own protection. My Queen Frigga..."

Her words brought Odin's head around quickly. People had tried to kill his wife? For his crimes? Her hesitation over his mother's name... "Continue."

"I will not betray My Lady's confidences, nor think ill of her. I trust she told you of our contacts and did what she thought best." Her voice was soft but firm, unwavering in her devotion to Frigga, but still not confronting her king.

Loki's mind whirled. His mother had not delivered any messages from his wife. Why? To protect him or to protect Sigyn? "I knew of your communications, but not of their content. I'm sorry that I did not question her further, but... Please. Tell me of what you and my wife spoke, as I cannot ask her myself." Sigyn and Frigga's affection for each other was a secret from no one, so it was easy to play upon her loyalties to his mother and her grief over her death.

She hesitated, but eventually spoke. "My Lady Queen said that she would deliver my messages to my husband. I conveyed several to her though our communications. I sent news, my love, and... The words of a wife to her husband. For my own safety, I had to remain in Bredablik(*2)." Loki thought of the shining palace that he had built for them, and the plans they both had.

_Loki's forearm was pressed firmly in the small of Sigyn's back with his hand splayed possessively over her hip, holding her body tight to his, while his other hand cradled her head. His long fingers were threaded through her hair, her willingly following his guide so that he could plunder her mouth. Her arms were wrapped around his shoulders, one palm on the bare skin of his neck while the other gripped and tugged at the shoulder of his armor._

_Odin and Frigga stood in front of them, sharing a look of indulgence for the newlyweds. Meanwhile Thor shifted uncomfortably on his feet, along with Sif, Fandrel, Volstagg, Hogun, and Tyr. Finally, when it seemed the newlyweds would not separate, Odin cleared his throat. Loki broke contact for the briefest of seconds, his eyes taking in the discomfort of the others._

_With a sly smile he returned to the lips of his bride, eyes closing in pleasure. While the others watched, magic swirled around them. Within seconds, Loki had transported himself and his bride to Bredablik. A shining palace that he commissioned the moment he convinced her to be his wife. He designed the entire place with her in mind, and the bedroom they appeared in was no different._

_Cream and ivory linens, furs, and silks covered nearly every surface, from the large canopied bed with silver etchings in the ebony headboard, the floor to ceiling curtains and drapes, to the large chaise with silver embroidery. The plush rugs made of the softest furs caressed their feet and the softly scented breeze shifting their clothes reminded him that he wanted her naked beneath him._

_Her nails scraped along the neck of his armor, and he hissed, green eyes flashing open to stare into her bright silver eyes that were dilated with arousal. He would have her tonight, and judging from her response to the thrust of his hips, she was going to have him as well. They had waited for this moment, Loki's love and respect for her outweighing his passion, only barely enough to last him through the quick engagement._

"My Lady Queen told me that..." She hesitated again, though not out of protection of his mother. She was choosing her words. "That Loki was not well. He would not accept the comfort or advice that she offered him. My Queen said that he would not benefit from my presence and... He would use his words to hurt me. My Queen wanted to spare me that pain and I allowed her to take the burden alone when I should have... I should have taken care of Loki and lightened her heart."

He was jolted from his memories before his illusion started to suffer and Loki stared at her through Odin's eyes. She was telling the truth. Sigyn always was so innocently truthful. "In these years you have remained loyal to Loki?"

"Of course, My King." Loki's eyes went to her hand, searching for the ring he had given her. It was there. The black star-sapphire surrounded by diamonds in a white band sat on her finger, loose as if she had lost weight since he last saw her.

"Walk with me." Odin stepped down from his throne platform, striding to her then motioning her to walk next to him. They crossed to the balcony and began walking the long marble path around the throne room. It was time to do what he had brought her here for.

"Loki is dead." He watched her face as he said it, but her laughter made him scowl.

His scowl must have transferred to the illusion because she stopped. "I'm sorry my Lord, but I do not understand. I thought you spoke in jest."

"Thor took Loki to the Dark World to save Asgard. He died in battle, and has been forgiven for his crimes due to his heroic actions."

She was silent for a long time. Then she moved to the edge of the bannister and stared out over the city, hands placed calmly on the cool stone. "Odin All-Father... I do not wish to offend you," Loki internally flinched at being called by his false father's name. "But, Loki is not dead."

Loki stared at her, pausing to formulate his response. Did she truly know him so well that she could guess his movements? Know that he wouldn't allow himself to be killed on some far away planet and that it was all a ruse? "What do you mean?"

He stood next to her, looking at her profile as she stared at the sky. Her hair was swept back from her face with braids to cascade down her back and the skin over her cheekbones took the light like polished ivory.

"I have known Loki since we were children. I knew him again in adolescence when we shared the learning of Lady Frigga's magic." She sighed, tilting her head and Loki watched a small curl fall over her forehead.

"And then we were separated. After a long time apart, we returned to find each other grown, and with a deep link to each other. When we wed, our connection was seared into us. I would know if he had died." She met his eyes for the first time that day and smiled. "I would have felt as if my heart were ripped from my body as the connection vanished." She ducked her head almost bashfully, but there was a hint of resignation. "I can still feel him."

Loki felt the air get sucked out of him as his vision tunneled on her. "You can tell no one of this. Do you understand? I must speak with others, and send out a search party for his body." His voice was desperate, she must never tell anyone that he was alive.

"Of course." She nodded. "When you find him, what will happen to him? Will he be imprisoned again?"

"No." He could not tell her his real plan, to take the throne, but he needed to tell her something. "Thor does not want the throne, but I cannot allow Loki the position. He has been absolved of his crimes but the people still hold him responsible. He must be given time to change. To convince the people that he is worthy. For now, nothing is certain."

She nodded. After a few more minutes, they returned to the throne room, Loki as Odin dismissed Sigyn, and returned to the royal chambers. He spent the next few days deep in thought.

#########################################################

Theoric was killed by Loki in the Marvel info I found online. I prefer to write it as he made sure that Theoric's commander kept him in the field of battle, giving him time to woo Sygyn, instead of actively killing him. Theoric just so happened to die.

Bredablik was actually a palace belonging to Balder, Odin's secret son and Thor's half brother(in real mythology, not Marvel mythology). I stole it for Loki.


	2. Love is the hardest habit to break

Warnings: Slight non-consent or reluctance. Still adult content. Also, want to apologize for what I hope is going to be Loki's darkest moment. Should be all up after that.

Also, I would like to say that my group scenes are lacking. I am much better at one on one interaction, so I'm cutting the Avengers completely. Thoughts are welcome. If you know where the characters are taking me, can you tell me? I have no idea.

##############Love is the hardest habit to break, and the most difficult to satisfy.################

_Sigyn sat in the library of Bredablik, curled up on the leather couch reading by the fire. A whoosh of wind and a glow of golden light swirled in front of the fire and a moment later Loki's fists slammed down on the mantle, startling Sigyn as the dark stone cracked._

"_Loki?"_

_He turned, eyes dark until they settled on her. There was a moment, then his eyes lightened, his shoulders tightening, a harsh breath slipping out of him. "Sigyn... What are you doing here?" He turned away, grabbing a goblet and filling it from the wine on the table. Staring into the fire, he took a sip. She didn't know it but he was thinking of what to tell her. He could not tell her he was a Frost Giant, she would run from him, so a lie it must be. But perhaps with a thread of truth._

"_I was reading. What has happened?" Sigyn set her book aside, wrapping her silk robe around her as she stood._

"_I had an argument with All-Father. I am not his true son." He took another sip of his wine._

_Sigyn watched him for a moment. Then she stepped between him and the fire, taking the goblet from his hand. Setting it aside, she took his hand and kissed his palm. His long warm fingers stroked her face, his expression still tight. "What does that matter?"_

"_All-Father will never make me king, despite banishing Thor! For all he talks of loving us equally, he will never allow me to sit on the throne." He slapped the goblet off the mantel, sending it and the wine spilling to the ground, dangerous fury in his face. "I would make a great king."_

_Catching his face in her hands, she pulled him into a fierce kiss. "My Loki..." Pressing her body to his, arching against his tight frame, she kissed him until he wrapped his arms around her. His shoulders relaxed as she kneaded the muscles of his neck. "I shall love you no matter your station or parentage. I will always be yours."_

_His hands were quickly untying the belt of her robe, desperate to reassure himself in her body, slipping his fingers under her lace lounge wear. Pushing the green cape from his shoulders, she worked his gray leather shirt over his head followed by the gray fabric of his undershirt._

_Sigyn's fingers worked their way under the waist hem of his leather pants, finding the lacing just as he lifted her, spreading her thighs around his hips and pressing her back against the wall._

Loki bolted upright, his body aching as the dream ended. The memory. Looking around the king's quarters, he sighed, allowing himself to lay back down in an attempt to get back to sleep. Wishing he had Sigyn next to him.

###########################################

Loki, disguised as Odin, watched Sigyn through the bifrost. Heimdall stood guard nearby. "My King? You watch the Lady Sigyn very closely these days."

Odin turned to him, imposing as ever. "Heimdall. Look for Loki."

Heimdall hid his surprise well. "My Lord, is he not dead?"

"His Lady wife does not believe so." Odin's piercing eyes pinned the guardian. "If he is alive, then he must be brought home."

Heimdall slowly turned his eyes to the realms, seeking the former prince. To his surprise, there were recent traces of him on many of the nine realms. Seeking further, he found that once again, Loki was hidden from him. Not even his body could be found. "I fear you are right, My Lord. Loki's body is beyond my eyes, and I cannot see him. Only traces of him."

Odin nodded. "Keep searching. I would have my son come home." He strode away, returning to the palace.

Sitting alone in his chambers, his illusion gone but his presence protected, he contemplated what to do. He needed to convince her to go back to Bredablik, where he could keep an eye on her but still hide his true intentions.

He must dream walk and convince her to go back.

##########################################

She sat in her room, unknowingly mimicking the cross-legged position Loki also assumed. The only difference was that she sat on a bed while he sat on the golden floor of the King's Chambers his own bed behind him. Something odd was going on in court, but she could not identify it.

"Open your mind to me Sigyn. You know I am alive. Now look for me." His eyes closed as he concentrated on her energy. He could see her in a gazing pool he had made, but he couldn't feel her the way she seemed able to feel him. He needed her to open the connection from her side.

With a sigh, ignoring the sounds of people in the building, Sigyn thought. If anyone in court were acting strangely, she wouldn't know it. She had been gone too long. What would she know..?

Loki. She would know Loki. But could she get him to admit to anything?

Closing her eyes, she lay back on the soft bed, exhaling as she reached for her magic. Wrapping it around her words, she whispered. Within seconds she was plunged into sleep.

#############################################

She 'woke' to find herself standing in the throne room of Bredablik. There was no denying what it was after Loki's actions, but once upon a time it had only been thought of as a hearing room. Her heels clicked on the smooth floor and she was found herself dressed in her casual estate clothes, pants and a draped top.

"Loki!" Her voice echoed hollowly, the sound reminding her that this was a dream. The room had been designed so that nearly all sounds echoed melodically.

"You called?"

He appeared, stepping from behind a pillar, with all his usual grace. His long limbs were encased in leather, his dark head covered by the horned helm, his shoulders draped with a sweeping green cape. He was dressed as he had been to be king.

He seemed pleased to see her, until he noticed her attire. "My Queen..." He smirked, bowing low. When he straightened again, she found that he had changed her clothes. She was dressed in a shimmering green gown to compliment him, her shoulders and arms bare, with a twisting crown studded with gems resting on her head.

"None of your games, please My Lord." She swept a hand down her body, returning to her previous appearance thinking nothing of his words or the attire he chose for her.

"Such formality from my wife. Are you still my wife, Sigyn?" He circled her casually, acting as if he hadn't spoken with her in Odin's disguise, his voice whip thin. It was his 'I'm waiting for you to make a mistake' voice, and she knew it, though it had never been directed at her. What she said would be used against her, as she had seen him to do others before. She again chose her words carefully.

"Are you still my husband, Loki?" She turned his question on him. Though she didn't know where he was or if he was injured, he never would give away that information freely, this had already proved that he was alive. Sigyn was ashamed that she was disappointed. She had been hoping to be wrong, to find that Loki was dead, and that she was free.

He smirked. He had taught her of deception and games, and she would try to use it on him? "To my knowledge our union has not been lifted, either by death or order of the king."

"Then act like it." She glared at him, and he spread his arms inviting her to change what she would. With a blink, his cape and crown were removed, his leather garments replaced with the more casual cloth he had worn before trying to take a throne.

"Is this how you would have me? As nothing?" He crossed his hands behind his back, pacing around her, close enough that every so often his arm brushed her. She refused to turn her body to follow him, but when she spoke, her face tilted in his direction.

"If you were nothing but my husband, I would have you." She met his eyes, her lips relaxing. Loki stared at her for a moment, his movements gong still. _"If you were nothing but a man, I would have you."_ Loki shook the memory from his mind, dragging his eyes from her lips, aching to touch her as he had when she last said those words, when he put a ring on her hand.

He moved again, this time with a slight distance between them. "And yet, you did not come to me when the All-Father imprisoned me. Your lie is exposed... I was not a Prince or a King, and you would not have me."

"No. You were not a Prince or a King. But you were not nothing." She removed her jacket, tossing it to the ground. "You were an enemy of Asgard. The would be murderer of Odin." She pulled the edge of her shirt's neck line to the side and down, exposing a vicious scar. "The man I was punished for... nearly died for."

Loki stared at the scar. An arrow had passed within a hair's breadth of her heart. His magic reached out and found that it hadn't missed her heart after all. There was a small scar where her heart had been nicked by the passing projectile. "Frigga healed you..."

She released her shirt, pushing his magic out of her body as she did so. "Would you have me die for you?"

He didn't answer. They were both silent for long minutes.

"What are you doing in Asgard?"

Loki startled, wondering how she knew he was in their home world. The look on her face said she hadn't known until he looked at her. "You have learned new tricks since I have been gone."

"I had to. My husband could not protect me." She stood next to him now. "What are you doing in Asgard? You are supposed to be dead."

He turned on her then, his aura flaring with intimidation as he backed her against the long table that ran the length of the room. "I am regaining my rightful place. You will return to Bredablik, and there you will stay until I call for you. You will be my queen, and I will have you now!"

His magic crackled around them, her own coming up to fight it. His hands gripped her and pushed her down on the table, resulting to physical touch since his magic was not working on her, bending her over as his hips came to press against her bottom. She gasped, Loki had never turned his anger on her before, and had never touched her with the intent to hurt her.

He leaned over her, whispering harshly in her ear. "You are mine. Not Thor, not Odin... Mine." She struggled and he easily pinned her again, driving his hips harder against her, his manhood rising to the spell she always cast on him. "I will burn the nine realms to dust before I let you go. I love you."

She whimpered, and he grinned against her, dragging his lips down her neck. "Ohhh, do you like that?" He rolled his hips slowly, finding the crease of her easily thanks to her pants. He panted, breath hot and moist against her as his long fingers stroked what skin he could find without releasing her hands. "Are you wet for me, Sigyn? Shall I plant my son in you now?"

He bit her and suddenly her whimper turned to a sob. He blinked, jerking up to look at her face where it pressed against the table, tears seeping from her eyes. "This is not love, My Lord. This is obsession."

He stared at her, his cock withering at the pain on her face, both physical and emotional. "Sigyn... What have I done..?"

He pushed away from her and vanished, swirling magic left behind.


	3. A woman knows the face of the man

Yup, I took the Avengers out... They weren't working for me, but they might come back at some plot point. I still have no idea what these characters are doing, but I guess I'll go along for the ride.

###########A woman knows the face of the man she loves, like a sailor knows the open sea.###########

Sigyn sat on the balcony of the royal quarters, looking over the gardens. Sigyn had called an audience with Odin to speak with him of her husband. But instead of seeing her, he had her installed in Loki's former quarters. She had been there a week with Odin avoiding her. But it gave her time to observe the court and become reacquainted with the court politics.

Not much had changed. Some new faces, some new fashions, but the core of the Norse Court worked the same as it had for hundreds of years. If Theoric had lived, they would have been part of the same traditions of arranged marriages, carefully played court games, and a specific lifestyle. She hadn't loved Theoric, their marriage had been arranged since childhood, but they were were suited for each other. Sigyn's father was one of Odin's generals, Theoric was a great warrior. She enjoyed taking care of others, children and family, as well as caring for a home while he had enjoyed being cared for.

He had never thought her diminished because she had no desire to be a great warrior. Theoric had often said that her ability to care for a home would allow him to leave to battle with confidence, knowing he would return to a well run home. Not of great intelligence and knowing that about himself, he none-the-less encouraged her to read, write, and learn. They often had discussions that he admitted to not understanding, but was willing to talk with her anyway. They had been good friends and companions, and would have been well married.

"What has you so deep in thought?"

Odin's voice shocked her and she swiftly came out of her chair and dropped into an appropriate curtsy. "Please, Sigyn, you are family and we are alone here. You need not stand on formality."

"Yes, My King." She rose slowly, backing away and allowing him access to any chair of his choosing. Loki wondered if she had always done that. Her deference to her king was so ingrained that she did it without thought.

Glancing around, he chose the largest seat available and motioned for her to sit as well. When she did, he repeated his question.

"I was thinking of Theoric, My Lord."

Loki hid his shock well, thankful for his Odin-disguise. He hesitated, thoughts whirling as he decided on a question. "The young man you were betrothed to before my son?"

She nodded. "Yes, My Lord."

He couldn't hide the darkness in his voice when he spoke next. "Why?"

Her face immediately showed that she regretted saying anything. "I mean no offense to you or your son, My Lord."

Realizing that she had detected his irritation with her thinking of her previous betrothed, he concentrated to gentle his tone. "I will take no offense. I would know what you were thinking of him."

She seemed hesitant, settling into a smaller chair with a basket of knitting next to it. "I was only thinking of how my life might be had he lived."

Steepling his fingers in front of him, he nodded. "And what are your conclusions? Would you have been better served to wed other than my son?"

"Yes." Sigyn watched his reaction, wondering. "I would have been better served to wed another." She paused, watching his face but seeing no change. Beneath the facade, Loki struggled for control, reminding himself not to show his anger. She sighed, picking up the basket and removing the project she had been working on. As she began working she spoke. "Better served, My Lord, more content perhaps, but... for so short a time, I could not have been happier or more loved."

Forcing himself to nod, Loki stared out over the balcony. For long minutes they sat in silence, Loki/Odin in thought and Sigyn with her knitting. Their relationship had not always been easy.

###############################################

_Loki stood in a corner, shrouded in darkness, while many celebrated around him. The hunting party had returned, with Thor at the lead, with both game and tale of adventure. That was enough for many to stay up into the night, and possibly the next few days, drinking and dancing._

"_You have not yet asked me to dance, My Loki." Sigyn's voice whispered from behind him, and he turned slowly. Also tucked into the shadows, she would be barely visible to those around the bonfire, and neither of them would be identified._

"_Would that I could dance with you and not receive the inevitable mockery of my brother." He sipped his warm wine, knowing that taking her into his arms in public would cause more than his brother to comment._

"_Am I so embarrassing to you?" Her voice was level, but he immediately knew that he had said something wrong. "No, of course not. I simply meant that... Our association would bring commentary. You know I do not dance at events such as these. To do so would draw unwanted attention."_

_Loki's green eyes were locked on her golden ones, a hand on her shoulder, so he easily saw that he had not repaired the damage. Her eyes had flickered away and she shifted out of the weight of his hand. "As you wish, My Lord. I shall associate with another in the future." She slipped out of the shadows and he was unable to chase her through the crowds without causing a scene._

_He settled back into the corner he had been leaning in, taking a deeper draw on his goblet. Watching through hooded eyes, he tracked her progress around the room. She stopped at the table where a red-bearded warrior offered her a goblet of wine. She declined but spoke with him for a few moments. He leaned over the table filling another goblet with an amber colored liquid, and handed it to her._

_She smiled, speaking with him for a few minutes longer... During which Loki's grip on his own glass became tight. Sigyn then moved to a group of lords and ladies of similar age and standing, speaking with them animatedly. She remained there until she finished her drink, at which point a blonde warrior held out his hand to her. They danced._

_Loki shifted his stance. No longer leaning against the corner, he stood in a wide stance. His legs spread, arms crossed over his chest, and head tilted down it was obvious to any who looked that he was angry. Luckily, he still remained in darkness and no one noticed his threat display._

_Sigyn danced with him again, before being handed off to a delighted looking man Loki knew as one of his father's favored commanders. Pushing out of his corner, he followed them, circling the dance floor as they moved in the middle of it._

_When the dance ended, Loki swooped down, offering her his arm, with a causal smile for her partner. "I'm afraid I must steal her away for a few moments. The Queen asked that I speak with Lady Sigyn in her stead."_

_The man nodded understandingly, kissing Sigyn's hand and offering himself if she ever needed a dance partner, before striding back to his comrades. She didn't argue, knowing that to do so would only draw attention, and waited for Loki to speak his mind, obvious to her that Queen Frigga had not made any such request of Loki._

_Loki led Sigyn through the crowd and then out an arch to a quieter area. Looking around before he spoke, Loki met her eyes and spoke in a rough whisper. "If you think to make me jealous, you have only made me angry."_

_Her silver eyes were guileless as they looked up into his green ones. "Your pardon, My Prince, I did not think to cause any emotion in you."_

"_Did you not dance with those men, knowing that I watched you?!" Loki's glare was unforgiving, but his touch was as gentle as ever._

"_I did not."_

"_The truth, Sigyn." He bared his teeth angrily, "You think to play tricks... on ME?!"_

"_I thought only to enjoy myself, My Lord. My apologies if I drew your... attention." The way she said attention reminded him that they were still on a public street, and he took a step back, tugging his tunic to straighten it._

"_You are angry." His voice was back in control now, composure like a cloak around him._

"_You are dim-witted." She spoke with an unusual cold calm, one that should have warned him. She only spoke like that when she was furious, a state he had not often seen he in but should have taken heed of._

"_I find that hard to believe." Loki smirked, thinking they would have a verbal duel as they often enjoyed._

"_As I find your behavior." Her face was still and hard. "Now that I know your true intentions toward me, I find I no longer desire your company. If you will excuse me... My Prince." Adding insult to the fact that she was rejecting him, she tossed his title out, rather than his name, as he had become accustomed to hearing from her._

"_What has angered you, sweet Sigyn." He stepped in front of her when she would have left to return to the feast. "This anger is out of proportion to my refusal to dance."_

"_By the All-Father, you are slow tonight." Her eyes were flashing fire and anger. "It is not the dance I am angered over. It is your reason for refusal."_

"_I was under the impression that we were keeping our relationship secret... out of court gossip."_

"_Out of court gossip, yes. But not a secret."Her face finally showed anger as she hissed her next words. "One dance is not inappropriate for two of our station, and hardly likely to send others shouting of a torrid affair." She paused, her expression clearing for a moment as something occurred to her. "You have told no one... It is quite clear you do not intend to pursue me as far as you have claimed."_

"_And you have told someone?" He scoffed._

"_Of course, someone I trust not to gossip." She flinched away from him. "I would share my happiness with them. It is clear you have no happiness to share."_

_Suddenly, her anger became clear. By refusing to dance with her, she concluded that he was not as serious about their relationship as he had led her to believe. That she was a temporary liaison. He took her hand, swiftly walking back to the festivities, essentially dragging her along. "Come then. I will show everyone my intentions."_

"_Do not start something you will later regret. I would rather break our bond now, than have you change your mind later."_

_With a wave of his hand, the music changed as they walked to the dance floor, suddenly the raucous sounds settled into a slow melody. Pulling her into his arms, they began to dance, following steps they both had learned as children. The sudden change drew attention, and Loki's spine snapped even straighter when he caught sight of Thor standing at the edge of the group of dancers, wearing a goofy smile._

_When the music ended, Thor strode over with a few friends in tow. "It appears my brother's feet are as smooth as his tongue!" His voice boomed, and several people in the crowd laughed, though many took no notice._

_The young warrior that Sigyn had danced with previously offered her his hand. "My Lady, might I free you from the chore of making the Prince look good?"_

_Loki's entire body was tight and rigid, his pride brittle and hard around him, refusing to look at Sigyn. Apparently she was tired of hiding their relationship, as he had realized his recent dark mood was caused by. Her small hand tucked around his elbow, and she gently dismissed the warrior. "I apologize, Sir. The Prince is currently in negotiations for the rest of my dances this evening."_

_The blonde nearly choked and Thor's face fell into shock as Loki's head whipped down to stare at her. Her polite words not only dismissed the man, but indicated that she and Loki were more than acquaintances. It also presented Loki with a choice. He could claim the rest of her dances for the evening, and declare his intention to court her, or he could hand her off, effectively saying that he was not interested in pursuing her. His response would be clear to anyone in their social circles and neither of them would be socially harmed by either choice. But both choices would have far reaching effects on their relationship._

_Once again he was struck by her intelligence, and ability to prompt others to action with little effort. For a moment, it seemed as if everyone in the room had frozen and all were silently staring at them. Then the split second was gone, and he smiled at the young man, a sarcastic triumph in his expression._

"_I have claimed Lady Sigyn's dances for the..." He paused. She had thrown him several times tonight. It was his turn to throw her. "For the foreseeable future." Now she looked at him in shock. He grinned, and with little care for the gossip he had tried so hard to avoid, lifted her chin to plant a short kiss on her lips._

###############################################

Sigyn looked at Odin through her lashes. Something was wrong. She didn't know him well despite being his daughter by marriage. They had never spent much time together, but... With Loki somewhere in Asgard with plans for the throne, she was on watch for anything suspicious. And something about Odin was... off.

"What did you want to speak with me about?"

Odin's voice reminded her that she was not just observing him, she was sitting across from him. "I... I wondered if you had any news of my husband."

"I put Heimdall on the task. He has found evidence that Loki is alive, but cannot locate him." Odin's eye sharpened on her. "Do you know anything of his whereabouts?"

She hesitated. Loki wondered who would invoke more loyalty from her, the king or the husband. "I had a dream. He visited me."

"Mmmm... And?" Loki hide behind the facade of his father, smirking. Waiting for her to say something he could hold over her. "Where is he?"

"I do not know his exact location, My King. He is a god of lies and it was a dream. Nothing he said or did could be trusted as the truth." She was avoiding the question, quite adeptly. Not for the first time, Loki wondered who had taught her deception while he had been away. She had not been as good when he had left.

"Alright. Where do you THINK he is?" Odin's voice was smooth and coaxing, almost too silken, and Sigyn wondered if her husband was closer than anyone thought.

Perhaps sitting across from her. She reached for her magic, slowly gathering a tendril of it to reach out to him while she spoke. "I would not betray you, My King, but I would not want to betray my husband either."

Odin smiled. "I will not imprison Loki. Only restore him as my son. Give him a chance to redeem himself for the throne." He paused. "If you tell me where he is I can help him."

Her magic touched him, letting her see past the illusion for a moment. To see the man she loved, who loved a title more. She pulled her magic back, her mind whirling.

"I have a feeling you know more than anyone, My Lord. Surely my dreams are of little consequence in the grand scheme." She gathered her things, standing gracefully. "Please pardon me, My Lord, but I must pack."

"Do you return to Bredablik?" Odin stood with her, walking next to her as they moved through the halls to Loki's former quarters.

"Yes." Her answer was quick. Almost desperate, and she forced herself to slow down. "Yes. I have been away too long."

"Yes, I suppose you want to prepare Bredablik for your husband's return." Odin smiled moving swiftly down the halls of the Palace.

Sigyn nodded until he was out of sight, whispering softly. "I don't think he will return to Bredablik when he lives in the King's Quarters..."

################################

Sigyn did not return to Bredablik. She went into hiding. Loki could still see her in his gazing bowl, but her magic hid her location from him. And it angered him. He set his plans in motion, having an illusion of Loki return in humility while he stayed on Odin form, working to earn enough of the people's trust, and begin transferring the throne to him.

Loki commanded Heimdall to find his wife, but even he could not see her.


	4. Love is life

So... I see that people are reading this but I can't tell if they open it and run away, or actually read the whole thing. I hope at least some of you enjoying it. Reviews? So I know what is going on?

I changed where this is going, so I went back and changed the first few chapters. Nothing major, just took out the Avengers and changed some wording. Hopefully it will all make sense, please let me know if it does not.

I'm thinking this chapter is going to be the first one with actual sex. I will warn you before it happens, but, how you got so far into this if you don't want to read anything like that, I have no idea.

###############Love is life. If you miss love, you miss life.#######################

Loki could not find Sigyn. But he could walk in her dreams. She had opened that door to him and he refused to allow it to close.

He found himself visiting her the night after he declared himself heir. She sat on a woven blanket under a tree, her back to him. "I see you have come to torment me."

"No." He stood, with stately purpose next to the tree. "I have come to apologize."

"For what, My Lord?" Her voice was calm, cut off. Loki wondered if she had witched her emotions to not react to him. "I gave you right to my body when we wed."

He nodded. "I do not have the right to hurt you... to frighten you."

"You have the right to do more." Sigyn stood, walking away. As her husband and the next king Loki could cast her out, sell her into slavery, even kill her without punishment.

"I do not. I swore to protect you, even from myself." Loki followed, walking a few steps behind her. "You have discovered I hide in Odin's image. Why have you not reported this to Thor, or those in Asgard who would not have me as king?"

"I took you for my husband. I take the consequences of that choice." She looked back at him and once again he wondered if she had been sick. Her eyes were dimmer than he liked them to be, her movements all had a limp quality. "I will not betray my Kingdom, nor my husband. I will do what I must to allay my conscience."

"Come home, Sigyn." He caught a strand of her hair as he had so long ago. "I would have you as my queen."

"Choose another. Set me aside." She pulled away, her feet crunching in the new fallen snow.

"I will not. My heart cries out for you."

She scoffed. "You heart cries out for power and the throne. Find a queen who feels the same, and once she has a son by you, let her kill you in your sleep what you both crave."

#############################################################

Loki growled, stalking his chambers. His thoughts were plagued by the words of Sigyn. If Frigga were here he would go to her with this. Thoughts of his mothe... Frigga were painful. Loki had lost all confidants and now wondered if he could keep his own counsel when it came to Sigyn. He had never been able to predict her.

###########################################

Loki, his illusion of Odin still in the palace, began to search more earnestly for his wife. Without being able to see her himself, Loki went to a seer. Volsp was not as powerful as Frigga had been, nor able to see as Heimdall could, but her predictions were never wrong. Never precise... but never wrong.

"Seer, tell me of Sigyn. Where is she?"

The man chuckled. "She is hidden from you."

Loki sneered at the man. "Yes, I am aware of that."

"If you cannot find her, what makes you think I can?" Not an old man, Volsp flexed the muscles across his shoulders in a shrug.

"Sigyn knows how to hide from me. If you do not know where she is now, tell me where she will be."

The seer poked at the fire in his hearth. "She is trying to die."

"What!" Loki's magic flared with his anger and fear, his hair and coat fluttering before he could get it under his control again. "All the more reason for you to tell me what you know."

"She does not want to be found."

Loki slammed his hand down on the table. "I do not care!"

"That is your problem, Prince Loki." The man smirked. "Have a care for what she wants."

"You would rather her die, than help me?"

"No." The man sighed, standing. Taller than Loki, broader too, he looked enough like Thor for Loki to raise his lip. "What I see depends on you."

He moved to a shelf, retrieving a small pouch, before returning to the fire. Tossing a pinch he sat, staring into the now purple and blue flames. After several minutes Loki made a sound of expiring patience.

After several more minutes, during which Loki paced, The fire died down, changing back to orange and yellow flames.

"Well?"

"You would be well served to learn that great things take time." He closed his eyes wearily. "I saw your wife."

"And when, pray tell, shall I see her?" Loki's voice was harsh.

"The God of tricks is bound by his lady

The dog star tells of a spell, cast on one

The harbinger will cry of a throne given

Serenity will be found after sorrow

For the willing to give there be gifts."

Loki nodded, committing the words to memory. "Is that all."

"One more thing, Loki Odinson..." Volsp held up a hand, forstalling Loki's words. "You will gain more with honey than you would with vinegar."

"Is that part of the prophecy?"

Volsp shook his head. "No. Only words of wisdom."

Loki strode out of the home, calling over his shoulder. "I do not need your wisdom. Only your visions."

###########################################

Several weeks later, Loki had put his disguise over the real All-Father who lay deep in Odin-sleep, as he had since Thor went to the dark world, and now ruled Asgard with little opposition. There were some who questioned him, but without Odin, Thor, or Frigga, the people who opposed him had no options. And he was doing a good job as king. Now all he needed was Sigyn at his side. His own refusal to make an illusion of her chafed at him, his court questioned her absence, but he could not bring himself to fake her presence.

He visited her dreams, almost every night now, to assure himself that she was alive. Some nights he couldn't find her, even in the worlds she made with her sleeping mind, she was sometimes able to hide from him.

Tonight though, despite walking through a forest of fog, he found her.

"When will you return to my side, Sigyn?"

She looked down from her perch in a tree. "I am surprised you do not know how to get me there."

"I am King now."

"I have heard." She looked away. "Are you content now that you have what you want?"

Loki inhaled slowly. "It is not in my nature to be satisfied."

"Ah. Of course." Her voice caught. "This quest is over, on to the next?"

_Loki appeared in Bredablik, fully expecting to find his bride waiting for him. But he could not find her at all. She was not in the library, dining hall, gardens, sitting rooms, or even the sun room. "Sigyn!"_

"_Yes Love?"_

_He spun, unable to find the source of her voice. "Where are you"_

"_That would be cheating. You have to find me to earn your prize."_

_Loki's face split into a wide toothy smile. Shrugging out of his cloak, he quickly climbed to the second floor, taking the stairs two at a time. "I am in a gaming mood. What is to be my prize?"_

_Her voice seemed to whisper past his ear. "What is always your prize?" She laughed, the sound echoing down a hall._

"_Ha!" His long strides ate up the hardwood, boots hitting the floor in rhythm. "Don't make it too easy for me, Darling."_

"_I never do..."_

_Pausing at a crossroad of halls, suddenly he split, his illusions going down one hall each. She laughed again. "No cheating, My Loki."_

_All of his duplicates returned to him, scrambled and all with memories of seeing her. "Clever of you."_

"_Mmhhmm..."_

_He glanced to the left, then the right, hoping for another clue. Finding none he headed for their bedroom, half hoping to find her there and take his prize, half hoping the game would continue. The doors opened without a touch, both doors gliding on a whisper._

_She wasn't there. His stomach leaped in anticipation of further chase. "Won't you speak, my love? Give me another clue?"_

_There was a pause, then... "I will trade a clue for your shirt."_

_Loki grinned, following the trace of magic that allowed her voice to follow him. His fingers moved to the buckles at his shoulders, threading them and pulling them loose as he moved. "Very well." The laces at his throat went next, and then he was able to pull it over his head._

"_I do love your hair mussed."_

_He grinned. "My clue please, Lady Wife?" He dropped the shirt in the middle of a hall, not telling her that he was already following her voice._

"_Mmmm, alright." She paused. "A place you have been, I was not in. Try once again, you will find me within."_

_Loki grinned. "That was a truly awful rhyme." So he must search a room he had already looked in, eh?_

"_I was unprepared. I did not think you would need a clue." Her voice taunted him, her magic leading him down the east corridor._

_He paused. He hadn't searched for her in the east wing, as they did not use it yet, he had built it for their children. So why was her magic leading him there? It was a trick._

_He turned around. Thinking of the rooms he had searched, he tried to pin point where she would hide. Carefully tuning his senses, he ignored her magical trail, instead searching for her physical signs._

_A wicked smile crossed his face and he headed back downstairs._

_Apparently she could tell he had figured it out, the sigh evident in her voice. "From now on, no clues..."_

"_Oh, don't give up now, Darling, I could be wrong." Loki smirked_

"_You are never wrong."_

_Loki smirked. "I will remind you of this when you decide to argue with me."_

_He pushed open the door to the sun room, looking around. She wasn't there. He growled. His voice turned sweet for a moment, while he spoke. "Another clue perhaps?"_

_Nothing but silence. That meant he was very, very close and she dared not speak or she would give her position away. Looking around the room slowly, he stretched his magic. But he didn't sense her here._

"_Try once again..." He muttered under his breath, then strode out of the room, shutting the doors. After a moment he opened them again, and there she stood. Sheathed in silk, her hair loose around her bare shoulders, Loki felt himself tighten._

"_Husband." Her smile was soft and he grinned._

_Moving toward her, he delighted in her shriek of surprise when he didn't stop until he had her in his arms, both of them falling to the floor in a tangle of limbs._

"_Your quest is over, Dear Loki. What shall you seek next?"_

**WARNING: Mature content ahead. If you want to skip it, scroll down until you see more bold text like this.**

"_I shall seek your pleasure, Sweet Princess." Loki grinned down into her flushed face. Kissing her hard, his hands positioned her thighs on either side of his hips._

_She smiled saucily. "And you will have it."_

_His mouth settled over hers, both of them arching as they filled with butterflies. Still new, only married three months, every sensation was amplified. Her hands on his bare back, stroking the skin and the lean muscles beneath, the feeling of having her beneath him..._

_He thrust his hips against her, taking satisfaction when the mewling whimper told him she was as effected as he was. The silk under his hands was warm from her skin, until he hooked his thumbs in a fold, yanking and filling the air with the sound of ripping fabric._

_She gasped, head thrown back as he nibbled her neck, his hand reaching between them to the lacing of his pants. He bit down slightly too hard when her hips bucked against him, and she yelped, the sound turning into a long coo as her nails dug into him._

_Tossing his head back to get his hair out of his face, he looked down at her. Bare, scraps of silk clinging to her skin, flushed a dusky rose. He made a discovery that moment, that when she was panting for him, her lips turned the same color as her nipples. He grinned wolfishly, licking his lips in anticipation of ravaging his little red riding hood._

_Once his cock was freed from the tight leather of his pants, his fingers stroked her thigh, searching upwards until he found his prize. Soft, hot, and wet, her core clenched when he slipped a long digit inside her. He grit his teeth, hard column of flesh pressing urgently against her leg. Her hips rolled under his hand, fingers sliding in and out of her, pressing upwards at times, pounding deep when she cried out._

_She came apart in his arms, her body flexing and arching on the fur rug as her inner muscles pulled and tightened, trying to suck him deeper. Her breath was coming fast and hard, her eyes closed, as she moaned and writhed, small tremors rippling under her skin. Guiding himself to her entrance, he pressed the blunt head of his erection into her._

_Propping himself up with his knees he gripped her hips, pulling her off the floor and partially onto his lap. Thrusting deep, he felt her orgasm again, clenching and throbbing around him like heaven. Sweat had beaded on their skin, making them slick as he thrust again, planting himself to the hilt. She cried out for him, and Loki leaned over her, whispering binding magic in her ear as he slowly pulled away before sinking into her._

_Flexing her hips, a trick she had learned recently could drive him to madness, she grinned. With two climaxes under her belt, the edge had been taken off for her and now she played with his control. Thighs tightening around his hips she arched, rolling her hips. Loki had to devote his control to stifle his reaction._

_What she whispered in his ear next, made him growl a response, hips starting a fast deep rhythm. "I would have My Husband give me a child." As he felt the start of release, his muscles stood out stark on his skin, stretched tight over him, pulsing. He spilled into her, grunting, fingers griping her with bruising strength._

**Mature Content has ended. Well... At least the sex is over.**

_After a moment, Loki settled their bodies into a more comfortable position next to each other on the floor. Both of them were breathing hard, their skin damp, hair mussed and tangled. Their hands continued to trace paths over each other, and Loki found himself pressing his nose to her neck._

"_Your quest is over, My Love. What now?" She grinned, turning onto her side and into his arms._

"_On to the next." He grinned._

_She lifted her shoulder coyly. "Oh, and what quest is that?"_

"_To prepare the East Wing, of course." He grinned. He knew he hadn't planted a child within her today, with his power he would know, but he would enjoy continuing to try. She only laughed._

"My only quest is to have you at my side again."

She hummed under her breath. "And if I told you you had to choose. Me as your wife or you as my king... What would you choose?"

Loki hesitated. He had worked so hard to be king, fought and betrayed. Would he give it up for the woman he loved?

"That is what I thought."

"I have not given you my answer yet."

She tilted her head, a sardonic smile crossing her lips before fading. "Your silence spoke loudly." Turning, she shifted her body off the tree branch. Instead of floating down as they had as children, she dropped only slower than a stone would fall, landing in a hard thud that knocked her off her feet.

Loki rushed to her side. "You are weak. What have you done?"

She stood, pushing his hands away, straightening her spine with apparent effort. "Nothing."

"Volsp told me you want to die. Now, tell me what you have done to yourself." Loki followed. He knew that this was a dream world, but he couldn't help wanting to catch her if she fell again.

A short sharp sound came out of her, between a laugh and a yelp. "You went to Volsp? You are desperate. Worry not, I will soon be weak enough for you to find me."

Loki appeared in front of her. "Why do you want to die?!"

She stared at him, and he could see the weakness on her face. Sigyn seemed to sag under her own weight, neck fragile, wrists and arms looked thin as a bird's bone. Her clothes fit her ill, hanging from her as they would from a branch, empty, cold, and lifeless. Her movements were stiff, as if to stop from shaking.

"I would be free of this life."

"Free of me, you mean."

She nodded. "You claim to be burdened with purpose." She quivered, before she held herself tight again. "While I am burdened with the shame and guilt of your crimes. I must bear a heavy heart as I choose between my husband and my kingdom. Every choice I could make is wrong, so I am removing myself."

"If I am your king and your husband, then there is no choice." Loki's eyes bore into hers, refusing to plead with her, but refusing to let her go.

"My heart is already too heavy. I will not take profit from your sins or I am doubly guilty, and a hypocrite."

The world started to fade around them, bits of it crumbling as only a dream could, seeing through to other dreams.

Loki was shot out of the dream world, gasping for air. The dream had crumbled from her weakness, not from her waking. She had lost control.

He sent his magic in search of her, and found her. In a dark room of a manor he did not know, his wife lay in a bed dying.


	5. A very small degree of hope is sufficent

Yeah! I got reviews!

Thanks to thelittlegnome for being my first reviewer and letting me know that this is actually decent. I think the fact that FFnet tells me how many people look at my chapters is too much information because it freaks me out. It looks like diminishing returns or attrition because the first chapters always have more views than the later chapters. My point is Thank You!

Also thanks to Queen Serenity for reviewing. I knew about the pairing feature but only as a reader, I had never used it. I fiddled with it till I figured it out(Clicked the 'x' first thinking it meant pairing and the arrow meant other characters but I got it) Thank you!

############A very small degree of hope is sufficient to cause the birth of love####################

"What is it?" Loki stared into the wrinkled face of the healer he had brought to the palace. Sigyn lay in the bed in the queens quarters, where he had placed her three days ago. She had not woken when he appeared at her side after her dream fell apart, when magicked her to the capitol, or in the days since.

His own magic had been unable to find the reason her body was slowly shutting down. So he had called every healer to the palace. So far none had any answers, so he was not expecting much out of this one.

"I believe I know the cause, yes. But I cannot prevent it happening again."

Loki looked at her with a raised eyebrow. "Why not?"

The woman shook her head. "I can heal the damage, but after I leave there is nothing to stop her from staving herself again."

"Starving herself..." Loki smirked. "You do not know her, Sigyn could never starve." She had always loved food. Cooking food, eating food, even the smell of food was pleasing to her. Some people found pleasure in a book or a sunset, and Sigyn liked those things, but she loved food. From nothing more than biting into a simple fruit to a complicated meal conceived by the royal chefs, she loved it all. The idea of her starving herself was preposterous. "You are wrong, look again."

He started to walk away but she stopped him with her words. "Look for yourself, My Lord. She has not eaten for weeks. I checked several times."

He looked over his shoulder menacingly. "Heal her and we will see." Loki turned, his green cape flowing behind him as he strode the golden halls.

###########################################

Sign sat, staring aimlessly out the window, propped up in bed. She had never been in this room before, but it was in the palace, judging by the view, and it wasn't Loki's princely quarters. The sun had just set, darkness settling over the city with flares of lights appearing in the streets as people lit their hearth fires and magical torches to brighten the night.

She should have know that Loki would not allow her to die. As soon as she had slipped into a coma, her magic had failed, all of her body's resources devoting themselves to keeping her alive as long as possible.

With a sigh, she looked from the city below to the sky above, wondering how long she could live like this. Under Loki's thumb or trying to die... to be brought back and put in her husband's care again.

Sigyn threw the soup she had been holding across the room, only to have it land a few feet from the bed, too weak to shatter the cup, leaving it to spill and spin across the hard floor. Pulling her knees to her chest, blankets tight across her lap, her elbows folded in to her body, Sigyn buried her face in her palms as tears silently leaked out of her eyes.

Volsp stood, just inside the door. "You should eat, Your Highness."

Sigyn nodded, unable to look up at him just yet. He knelt at her bedside, and waited.

After a few moments spent composing herself, she turned her face to look at him, resting her head on her knees. "Seer, will I ever be free of this life?"

He chuckled warmly. He had always liked Lady Sigyn Gunnarsdottir, finding her amusing and strong of character like her father. Though she was not a warrior, her father a general in Odin's army and her mother a lady warrior in her own right, she had a strength that didn't come from hefting swords.

There had always been warmth in her eyes, a sense of peace in her manner, and a bar of steel in her spine. All of it was gone now, replaced with a cold void and the weakness of a baby. She was draped in the wet silk of sadness that clung to her skin.

"That depends on what you mean by free, My Lady."

"By my death or his, I imagine."

"Then I am afraid you will have a long wait. Both you and your husband will live for several millennium beyond today." He smiled at her, attempting to coax any emotion from her, anything but sadness and apathy. "But, there is another way, if you are willing to look for it."

This time she spoke with a sardonic tilt to her lips. "I cannot kill my husband, Sir."

He ducked his head with a smile. "No I don't imagine that you would, My Lady. I meant only that there are other ways, other than death... Ways to live, and be happy."

"What would you have me do, Seer?" Her head lifted slowly, looking at him.

"I can not tell you your choices, only help you find them." He paused, lifting a hand to his mouth in thought. "Of your husband I will say this... Patience is bitter, but its fruit is sweet.(*1)"

"You think I should sit calmly by while he burns the nine realms with his ambition?"

Volsp shook his head. "That is not what I said."

"Then say something more than vague prophesies!" For a moment, she seemed to flare, life coming into her, but then just as quickly it was gone, her weakness returning swiftly.

"Gain your strength, My Lady, then gain your anger. Your husband is not the only one with the power to take control." Volsp stood then, worried he had said to much, and bowed a farewell.

Sigyn sat in her chambers, thinking on his words. When a servant came, to clean up the soup most likely, she ordered that she be brought another, along with a slice of bread, some ham, and an assortment of fresh fruit and vegetables. When it was brought to her, she couldn't finish it, though she tried until she nearly threw up. But she kept what she couldn't finish, and tried to eat for the rest of the day. And did the same the next day, and the day after that.

################################################

Loki watched his wife carefully. Her renewed vigor for life was... both impressive and frightening. She had risen from bed today, though her feet could only take her to a nearby chaise before her legs would not hold her. She still would not speak to him, allowing select few into her private chambers, but he could watch her in his gazing bowl, and meet her in her dreams again.

###############################################

"Back again, My Lord?" Sigyn looked down on him from the second floor of a great library.

Loki looked up, pleased with what he saw. Even though she had not yet returned to her former health in real life, in her dreams she now looked as she always had. "I will keep coming back until you return to my side."

She swept a hand along the bannister as she walked along the wall of the oval room. "How determined are you?"

"Very." Loki stood at the bottom of the spiral stairs, wondering if she would come down to him or if he would have to go up to her. "I will not dissolve our union as husband or king."

"Would you do anything for me?" She stood at the top of the stairs, bent slightly over the railing to look at him more intensely.

Loki's face hardened. "I have told you, I will not give up the throne."

She nodded. "Yes, but other than that? Would you kill for me?"

"Of course." Loki looked at her with speculation. Sigyn had never, would never, ask anyone to kill for her. "What has happened?"

"Nothing has happened." She smiled gently. "If you would kill for me then what I will ask of you will be nothing."

She turned, the swirl of her skirts becoming a swirl of magic as she vanished.

Loki turned, expecting to find her behind him, but she wasn't there. He turned on his heel, scanning the room, but still didn't find her. "What will you ask of me?" He waited but got no response from the now empty library, nothing but the sound of his own boots.

################################################

Sigyn sat with Volsp, a fire between them, hidden from all even Loki's gazing bowl. Volsp was casting in the flames, a two objects appearing in the fire. He nodded to her and her hands took over, her magic flowing into the metal. He whispered a spell, enhancing her powers temporarily. She was powerful enough to have needed training from Frigga, but this spell needed more than she had to offer. She would sleep most of the day tomorrow, if Volsp was correct about the amount of power this spell weaving needed.

When she started to falter, he gave her another boost, drawing on her reserves of magic usually left untouched for life threatening situations. Of the Asgardians that could use the magic flowing through them, very few could draw on that reserve power consciously. Sigyn was not one of them.

Soon the magic was done, the fire dying down to coals as the magic glowed briefly longer then disappeared. Volsp reached into the fire, removing what they had made. Despite being in the fire it was cool to the touch when he placed it in her palm. He wrapped his hand around her other wrist, his hand glowing slightly before he pulled away.

Cleaning up the fire, they silently bid each other goodbye, Volsp leaving the darkness of the deep room Sigyn had found for them.

After he was gone, she wondered if she could go through with it. Staring down at the object in her hand, knowing it would change everything, could she do what she had planned?

################## Warning.. REALLY LONG flashback

_Sigyn sat across the table from Queen Frigga, referencing a book before writing a few sentences then looking at the clock. A pattern that repeated itself until Frigga noticed it. Setting aside the papers in her hands, Frigga watched the girl for a moment._

_With an arched brow, an expression Loki had learned, she spoke, startling Sigyn. "Is there a problem, young lady?"_

"_No, You Majesty, I apologize." The nine year old looked down at her work again, trying to concentrate. A few minutes later there were footsteps in the hall outside the closed door. Despite her resolve to stay focused on what The Queen was teaching her, she looked at the door then swiftly at the clock again._

"_Sigyn, what do you have planned after your lesson today?" Frigga's voice was knowing, it was close to the end of their session, and the young lady had all the signs of a student eager to be out the door._

_Unable to, or unaware that she should, stop her youthful exuberance, Sigyn smiled broadly at her. "Prince Loki has said he will take me to The Lake of Ages. He found something wonderful and he wants to show me!"_

"_Ah, yes..." Knowing her son as she did, Loki could have found a lizard nest, a cave made of diamonds, or anything in between. It was most likely a lizard nest, but with Loki, it could be anything. "Finish your work, and I will check and see if he has arrived yet. As soon as you are done you may go."_

"_Thank you, My Lady!" Sigyn immediately dove into her work, writing furiously as she glanced between her paper and the tome._

_Sure enough, when Frigga stepped outside, her youngest sat in the widow ledge, long gangly legs hanging down. Loki, at sixteen, was lanky: all arms and legs, with a floppiness to his movements indicative of a growth spurt. "Hello, Loki."_

"_Mother!" He jumped down from the window, stumbling only slightly on his large feet, as he rushed to bow, before going to her side. "Have you finished your lesson?"_

"_Not yet. I want to speak with you while Sigyn finishes her work." She sat on nearby bench, and motioned him over until he sat next to her. "I understand you have distracted my student with promises of something wonderful at The Lake or Ages..."_

_He nodded, but offered no other explanation until she pressed further. "What are you showing her? Girls do not appreciate snakes and bugs."_

"_Oh, nothing like that," He grinned, "I found something that looks like shooting stars!"_

"_What is it?"_

_He shrugged, with an indifference of youth. "I don't know."_

_Frigga tilted her head, placing an arm around her son's still slim shoulders. "Why are you taking Sigyn? Wouldn't a girl your age be more appropriate? Perhaps Sif?" Her son had shown enough interest in girls, that Frigga had no doubt there was a girl in court that he fancied._

"_No." Loki made a face. "She is with Thor and the others. They don't care for anything other than battles and weapons." He looked at her, nearly level with her eyes reminding her that he would soon be taller than she was. "Sigyn overheard and wanted to see it. I want to show someone who will appreciate it."_

"_I understand." Frigga nodded. Loki was sensitive, finding more use in books and thought than most children. Traits not valued as much in Asgard as they should be. Frigga often wished Thor could be a bit more thoughtful, rather than charging off without a care for danger or wisdom. Loki could play at war with his brother but did not find much joy in it._

_Brushing his hair off his forehead, smiling when he frowned and moved out from under her hand, mussing his hair again with his fingers, Frigga sighed. "Very well. Please remember, Sigyn, is quite younger than you are. Be careful of her safety, if she is with you, you are responsible for her well being. She may not be able to climb or run as well as you can."_

"_Of course, Mother. I would never put her in danger." Loki looked somewhat offended that she thought she had to tell him that. "I am not Thor."_

"_No, you are not, and I am grateful for that." Frigga kissed his forehead, ignoring how he wiped it away with a sigh. "Now come, let us check on the young lady."_

_When they pushed open the door, they found her cleaning off the table. She smiled brightly and scampered over to hand her pages to Frigga. Doing a quick curtsy, Frigga nodding a dismissal, she started to run out the door with Loki. "Wait!"_

_Both turned to look at her, impatience in their eyes, Loki bordering on impertinence. She only smiled. "You might want to change out of your gown if you are to go on an adventure with my son."_

_Sigyn grinned, dropping into another curtsy. "Thank you, My Lady. I will."_

_Loki rolled his eyes, grabbed her hand and tugged her through the door. Frigga could hear their footsteps as they ran lightly down the corridor._

_#################################################_

"_Come on, Sigyn!" Loki stood waist deep in the water of the lake, watching the hesitant girl on the bank. He had stripped off his shirt and boots, leaving him in just his pants, while she stood in her undershirt and pair of slim trousers._

"_You did not tell me we would have to swim to see this!" Sigyn's face twitched, looking over her shoulder at the city behind them, thinking of what her mother would say. "If I go home soaking wet, my parents will not let me out of the house for a month."_

_Loki shrugged, as if the answer were obvious. "Then don't go home until you are dry. Now come on!"_

_He dove under the water, swimming out into a deeper area, looking for the ledge he had found before._

_Sigyn's eyes widened. "Oh, yes of course. That would work!" Without any further hesitation she floundered into the water until it supported her weight, her clumsiness in the shallows vanishing as she swam, the water making her look graceful._

_Loki appeared a few yards away and called her over. "How long can you hold your breath?"_

_Treading water beside him, she made the most thoughtful expression he had ever seen a nine year old have. "I don't know. I have never measured it."_

"_Alright. I'll use my magic to help you breathe." He pointed down at the water. "There is a ledge, we are going to go under it and through the tunnel there. It comes up again and there is an air pocket. The stars are there, on the walls."_

_Sigyn looked confused, but nodded anyway. Loki took her hand, and counted. They both took a deep breath and began swimming down. Sigyn's fingers found the ledge, and she followed him to the tunnel. Squeezing his hand, she brought it to her throat. He nodded, and a soft glow covered her mouth, making her breath last longer. Then they were going through the tunnel._

_Just when Sigyn thought Loki would have to give her more breath, she felt them tilting up and they broke the surface of a small dark pool. She gasped for air, breaking contact with him as she wiped water from her eyes._

_When she opened them again there was a soft glow of magical light. Loki tugged her back and she found the edge of a long rock. They both sat on the rock as they looked around. The cave was so small that she could have reached up to touch the ceiling and Loki ducked instinctively. "There." Loki pointed across the small pool of water at the wall on the other side._

_Sigyn gasped again, this time out of awe rather than need for air. "It is beautiful..."_

_The wall looked like it was made of black glass or obsidian, except that just under the surface, lights shot across it like shooting stars. "What is it?"_

_Loki stared at the stars. "I don't know. It might be a leftover piece of the sky."_

"_Or a window to the other worlds?"_

_He nodded, looking at her as she slipped off the ledge into the water again. "You can't be done already..." Loki had stared at it for hours the first time he had found it._

_She shook her head, swimming the small distance to the star wall. "Can I touch it?"_

"_Yes. It didn't hurt me when I did." Loki slipped into the water following her._

_Sigyn reached up with one hand, laying a wet hand hesitantly on the surface. When nothing happened she traced the paths of several stars with her finger tips, eyes bright as she stared at it. "How did you find this?"_

"_I don't know, I just did." Loki was quite happy with her response. She was just as fascinated by it as he had been._

_They spent almost two hours in the cave before it started to get cold, and they swam out. The sun was setting when they surfaced in the lake, and Sigyn groaned._

"_What is wrong?" Loki looked over at her as they made their way to shore._

_Her face was sad as they climbed out of the lake. "The sun is gone. My clothes will never dry in time for me to stay out of trouble."_

_Loki shrugged. "Well, why not come back to the royal quarters? My mother can send word to your mother that you are there. You can change or dry off or whatever it is you want."_

_The palace held many families of the higher court, as well as special guests. Sigyn's family lived at the palace, so it would only be a matter of sending a servant down with the message. Sigyn nodded. "That might work."_

_###########################################_

_Loki stood, his shirt dry, pants still dripping, boots loose around his ankles looking up at his mother with a twinkle in his eyes. Sigyn stood next to him with her head bowed, undershirt and pants wet, her dry shirt folded over her arm, as she held a slight curtsy, slippers squeaking._

_Frigga looked down at the two of them, carefully controlling her features, so they wouldn't see her laughing. "Sigyn. What have you to say to me?"_

_Loki tried to interrupt, but Frigga stopped him with a firm movement of her hand. She wanted to hear Sigyn's version of what happened._

_Head still bowed, Sigyn spoke slowly and respectfully. "Your Highness. The Prince and I went to the Lake of Ages. He wanted to show me the stars on the wall, but they were underwater. We had to swim to get to it. I thought the sun would dry me off, but then we took too long and the sun went down."_

_Frigga touched her shoulder, prompting her out of her curtsy. "I won't say that I understand, but as long as you didn't get into any trouble, I will not be angry. But what do you want from me?"_

_This time, when Loki spoke up, his mother let him speak. "If she goes to her parents like this, they will not let her out of their rooms for a month. I thought that if you sent a message to her mother that she was with us... Just until she can dry off?"_

_Frigga sighed. The two damp faces looking at her... They hadn't gotten into trouble or caused any problems, just stayed too late in the water from what she understood. Being late was so low on the list of wrongs that Loki had done, that she would rather reward his effort to stay out of trouble. She didn't want to punish them for something so minor, even other children stayed out too late._

"_Alright." Loki whooped, while Sigyn only smiled gratefully. "Take her to my rooms, I'll see if I have anything for her to wear while these clothes dry. Then I want you to change too, Loki." Frigga waved a serving girl over, quickly giving her the message to take to Lady Brynja. Sigyn would be staying for dinner with the royal family._

_#################################################_

_Loki, in clean a dry clothes, stood with Sigyn who was dressed in what appeared to be his clothes from when he was a child._

"_Thank you." Sigyn stood with her back to the fire, trying to dry her hair._

_Loki blinked in surprise. "For what?"_

"_For taking me with you." Without warning, she wrapped her arms around his waist, burying her face in his bony chest in a tight hug. Loki stared at her in shock. Looking around. he hesitantly wrapped his arms around her small shoulders, returning the hug. Just as he was relaxing, he heard Thor's laugh._

_Jerking away as the twenty year old Thor laughed from the doorway. "Got a girlfriend, Loki? Seems a bit small!" _

_Loki pushed Sigyn away, and took a few steps, turning his back on her as Thor laughed again and left. Loki's face was red, and he crossed his arms over his chest, not knowing what to do. Sigyn, watched him, before coming up behind him. Wrapping her arms around him again, this time from behind, she squeezed him once. Then she turned and sat down in front of the fire, finger combing her hair._

############################################

*1 This is a quote from Jean-Jacques Rousseau. I did not come up with it.

Also, I have 2 different ideas about what Sigyn is going to do with that magic object. I think I'm going to write both and see which one works the best. Might take me a while to put up another chapter.


	6. Waste time looking for a perfect lover

I hope everyone got through that super long flashback... I tried to cut it but it just kept coming. Weird note: I uploaded the picture to the cover of the story, hopefully everyone can see it well enough. Apparently I am not the only one who imagines Sigyn looking like Amanda Seyfreid, judging by some of the fan art I found while finding inspiration for this chapter. I also decided I don't like her eyes golden. I'm going to leave them the silvery blue-ish color in the picture. I went back and changed the color in the story, let me know if I missed a spot, and I also put in the dividers that had disappeared in the first chapter.

I was going to ask, do you guys like the flashbacks, or do you think I am relying on them too much? My personal opinion: I think the flashbacks fill everyone in on their past, since we are coming into their relationship sort-of halfway through. I really want to show how they fell in love, instead of just them fighting in the present. Otherwise, why would Sigyn have such a loyalty to Loki, right? Let me know what you think.

Thanks to OWK77 for answering the question above before I even asked it! I'm glad you like the flashbacks. I couldn't agree more about character development. I mentioned above that Sigyn must have a very good reason for staying loyal to Loki, and I'm trying to develop a healthy relationship for them that would make her hope that "Her Loki" would come back eventually. I'm going with a 'torn apart by ambition' angle, possibly a 'driven mad by imagined insults.'

Thanks Babs108, I thought about the ages for a while. I was more concerned with the age difference with Loki and Sigyn, trying to not be creepy even though they live for thousands of years and even a twenty year difference would be nothing comparatively. I ended up going with a pretty conservative age gap for them, because I wanted them to be able to interact without a father/daughter tilt. I thought about Thor for a while too. I was trying to balance remembering that his mom hadn't been pregnant and enough of an age gap that there would be a feeling of competition, I'm kind of fudging what the movie showed, them looking very close in age, with the idea that Loki is tall and somber making him seem older and Thor is stocky and wild making him seem younger.

I don't remember anything from being 4 years old, though, so I think Thor would have reacted to a blood brother the same way as an adopted brother at that age. Kind of "There was no baby, but now there is a baby... Oh well." Kids are pretty flexible, and I think if an older child came in, Thor might remember there was no baby stage, but Loki came in as a baby.

I don't know about anyone else, but I think my earliest memory was kindergarten(I think I was 5), and even that memory is foggy and I'm never sure if I only remember because of people telling me about it. I don't have any memories that I am sure are mine until about second grade, at 6.

I got a little stuck with this chapter, whether to go straight into Sigyn's plan or to let her heal a little more and let Loki get complacent. Let's see what happens...

############We waste time looking for the perfect lover, instead of creating a perfect love############

Sigyn looked over the court, feasting and dancing. Sigyn was not well enough to attend the party but she sat in a balcony overlooking the golden chamber. Dressed in a gauzy column of frothy fabric, the under layer a dark bittersweet chocolate color, the over layer the shimmering shade of the inside of an oyster shell. Catching sight of a young girl, Sigyn sighed; probably only nineteen, dressed in the latest fashion and being formally presented at court this season, if Sigyn could still judge these things correctly.

Her purple gown, with a variety of brighter purple shades accenting her, was cut in a youthful style designed to attract attention. She was following her mother, acknowledging people she knew with graceful bows of her head and looking flirtatiously at all the young warriors. She bounced around, somehow still remaining ladylike despite her enthusiasm.

"What are you smirking at, My Queen?" Loki stood behind her, dressed for his role of king, watching her.

She straightened her spine when she realized he was there, no longer leaning to look over the edge. "Was I ever so..." She waved her hand at the girl, careful not to draw attention from anyone.

"Vivacious? Charming? Lovely?" Loki moved slowly, peering at the girl she indicated. "More so."

"Naive?"

Loki blinked in surprise and looked again. This time, in his mind's eye, he saw Sigyn when she had first been presented at court. "Mmm. I don't know. I remember thinking that you were very boring when you came back to court. But, most young ladies are..."

######################################

_Loki stood to the side of the entrance, next to his mother. It was Thor's birthday celebration and all the noble families of Asgard had been invited. Nearly all the noble families were in attendance, as opposed to the number of families that attended his own birthday celebrations. Usually only the lower families, a few families looking to advance, and those looking to pair their daughters._

_Odin had not arrived yet, probably wouldn't until after Thor arrived. He was very busy with kingly matters, though Loki didn't know exactly what. His mother was talking about something, but he wasn't really paying attention, his thoughts on the newest book he had found in a monastic library in the north. When she said a name he hadn't heard in years._

_His head whipped around to look at her. "What did you say?"_

_Frigga had an innocent look on her face, but on the inside she was smirking. "Weren't you listening to your mother, Loki?"_

_He smiled. "Of course I was, mother, I was just surprised. Did you say Sigyn?"_

_Frigga smiled broadly now. "Yes, I am not surprised that you have not heard. Lord Gunnar and Lady Brynja returned from the realms with their daughter. They are staying at their estate, but it is several hours away. I invited Sigyn to stay in the palace."_

"_That is generous of you, Mother. The court did not riot?" Loki took his mother's arm when she offered it and they started to stroll the ball room. If the queen took an unmarried Lady under her wing, especially one that had been gone for decades, usually the court would be in an uproar; the mothers furious that their daughters had not been chosen, the daughters furious at loosing their chance of spending more time with the royal family(and gaining a royal marriage), and general upset at being passed over._

"_Mmm... No." Frigga gave him a humoring look. "The court has kept their tongues civil, or behind their teeth, because of her betrothal. I also gave her the title of my apprentice, so they have little to object to."_

_Loki nodded. A Lady who was betrothed was no danger to the matchmaking mamas and their daughters, while being given the title of Queen's Apprentice was rare, most of the noble families knew of Sigyn's magic and that she had been trained by the queen before._

"_Besides, my sons no longer spend time with me. I needed a companion." Frigga's eyes made him feel guilty that he hadn't spoken with his mother in weeks. She glanced up. "There she is now." Frigga lifted her hand, motioning her forward from where Sigyn stood at the base of the stairs at the entrance. The crowd looked then parted, allowing her through._

_Sigyn's head bowed thankfully at the people she passed, her hands clasped demurely in front of her peach colored gown. When she approached the queen and the prince, she curtsied and rose without waiting for Frigga's permission. But when the Queen reached out and took her hands, Loki knew that it was not out of disrespect or boldness, only what his mother wanted and had probably told Sigyn to do. She probably only curtsied in public as well, if he knew his mother._

"_Sigyn... Or is it Lady Sigyn now?" Loki smiled at her, expecting her to be as sassy as ever._

_But she lowered her eyes and spoke softly. "Prince Loki, you look well your highness. I was officially presented at court several weeks ago."_

_Her words did not invite further discussion, and his brow creased. He glanced at his mother, but her eyes told him not to push. He would question her later, but for now, he took his leave of both women. He was disappointed in the Lady that his young friend had become._

######################################

There was a silence, then Sigyn smiled softly. "Do you really think she is beautiful?" The girl below was blonde, slim like most of the court girls, tall, and strong. Sigyn had never been typical, though she had tried very hard to fit in. To do honor to her mother and father.

"Indisputably so. Very fair. I imagine all the men will be after her soon enough. I've heard she is quite the darling of the age. Very accomplished with a variety of skills." Loki leaned one hip casually against the wood as he looked at the girl, missing the self-deprecating grimace that crossed Sigyn's mouth.

"You should join them. A king should not abandon his own party."

Loki shook his head slightly. "No. I'll not be joining any parties until I have my queen on my arm."

"I believe she is down there." Sigyn's voice made him turn to look at her. "You had better catch her before some other man does. A queen should be very accomplished. You would have married one like her if you had been the oldest and Thor the youngest."

Loki frowned, his voice harsh when he spoke. "You are my queen, Sigyn. I'll have no other but you."

"I am not a queen. I am not a warrior or a politician." Sigyn looked over the people below, thinking Loki always forgot that he was not the only one who hadn't fit in... Hadn't had friends. In all reality, Queen Frigga had been Sigyn's only confidant. Without her, Sigyn might have never returned to court after she was presented.

######################################

_Sigyn stood next to her mother and father, head bowed and hands clasped demurely in front of her waiting to be officially presented to King Odin the All-Father and Queen Frigga the All-Mother. Though her parents had been members of the court for a few thousand years, she had trained with the queen, and had been friends with both the princes, she still needed to be officially presented._

_It was as much for her official entrance to court as for her parents. Gunnar Helmsson and Brynja Annorsdottir, and Sigyn, had been away from court for little longer than two decades. Sigyn and her mother had followed Gunnar when he was sent to survey the troops across the nine realms, and had been gone since Sigyn was twelve._

_Now she would take her place with her peers, as she should have done over a dozen years earlier. Though she was technically in her thirties, Sigyn looked like she was barely twenty. Asgardian heritage kicked in shortly after puberty, making sure she would look much the same for several centuries before a hint of maturity touched her face, possibly even a thousand years before she looked older than twenty-five._

"_General Gunnar!" Odin's booming voice finally called them to the front of the small crowd in the throne room. The general bowed low, her mother affecting a graceful curtsy that Sigyn followed. "It is good to see you back from the front lines. Come." Odin nodded to his wife, Frigga, before he and Gunnar moved to the side, speaking of the troops._

_Frigga smiled warmly. "Lady Brynja, it is a pleasure to have you back at the palace." She held out her hands to Sigyn's mother who took them, though more out of duty than any real warmth. Frigga smiled before looking on Sigyn for the first time in many years. The twelve year old girl who had left the palace, though sad the day she left, had been an energetic and rambunctious \(but polite) child._

_The lady in front of her now was controlled, refined, and timid. Unassuming and solemn where the child that had played with her sons had been vibrant, outspoken, and delightful. "Young Sigyn. Come, let me look at you." Frigga held out her hands to Sigyn, much as she had to her mother._

_Sigyn's eyes looked to her mother first, who nodded in permission, and took a few steps forward. Frigga took her hands, holding them close while looking at her face. Sigyn had dutifully tipped her chin up, but respectfully kept her gaze low without making eye contact._

"_You have become lovely, Lady Sigyn." Frigga smiled, wondering if she could get the young woman to smile. "I'm afraid my son has run out of frogs to show you."_

_Sigyn's eyes finally flickered up, and Frigga was pleased to see amusement in the silver pools. "That is quite alright, My Lady, I fear I have grown out of my fascination with them." It appeared the bright young girl hadn't vanished, only lay hidden._

_Sigyn's mother, though lauded as both intelligent and battle worthy, was not a particularly warm or loving individual. She had taken over Sigyn's education when they followed General Gunnar around the realms, and Frigga imagined that a great deal of effort had been put into changing a wild girl into a woman full of propriety._

_Tucking Sigyn's hand into her elbow, Frigga nodded to Lady Brynja, walking with the new Lady Sigyn. "How has your magical education come along, dear?"_

"_I used all the books you sent, My Lady. Finished them in a few years." Frigga's eyebrows rose very slightly, controlling her facial expressions as they wandered through the others in attendance. Four other families were in attendance to present their daughters to the royal court, and most were watching the king and queen, waiting for their turn. "As you know, my mother is not gifted with magical control, and could not teach me beyond what you sent."_

_Frigga nodded. "It is impressive that you mastered those skills so quickly."_

"_I had little else to do, Your Highness. I'm afraid my magical education has been at a standstill for the past decade."_

"_Well, we shall have to resume your lessons then. Would you like that?" Frigga would be glad to have another student. Loki had surpassed what even she could teach him and he now studied alone, if he studied at all. No other noble children currently had enough power to need her training, when other tutors of a more appropriate skill level were available._

"_Oh yes, My Lady. I would quite enjoy your tutelage." Sigyn was not skilled at controlling her features in court, and her face was lit with a small smile._

_Frigga began turning them back towards Sigyn's mother. "Wonderful. Do you know where your family will be staying now that they are back in Asgard?"_

_Sigyn nodded. "Yes, my father has said we will be residing at his estate, only two hours or so from here, My Lady."_

"_That will never do. I can't have you traveling so long to your lessons and back home again. And you will have too much trouble coming to the parties you should be attending." Frigga patted Sigyn's arm. "I have a wonderful idea. How would you like to have a suite here in the palace?"_

_A stricken look crossed the young woman's face. "I... I believe I would love that, My Lady. But I don't think my mother..."_

_Frigga cut her off. "Let me handle your mother, my dear. Don't worry about a thing."_

_Within a month, Lady Sigyn was installed at the palace as Frigga's apprentice, with her own suite near the royal quarters. Her father had thought it a wonderful opportunity, but her mother had taken more convincing, hence the title of apprentice. Her lessons only took a few hours a week, but the Queen had been somewhat lonely since her sons had grown out of spending time with their mother. Sigyn only spent a few hours in lessons, but several hours were spent wandering the palace, shopping, or doing needle and knit work in front of the fire with the queen._

_Frigga was working to bring Sigyn out of the shell, made of propriety and formality, she seemed to live inside. Every now and then Frigga could see the real Sigyn; she would laugh or tell a joke. Even a sassy comment about one of the court ladies. But only in private, only just the two of them. In public Sigyn was still the formal and straitlaced girl that her mother had raised her to be._

_The unattached ladies of the court did not find her threatening to their chances with either prince, as Sigyn was already betrothed. But they made no effort to be friendly, Sigyn was too inexperienced with court games for the ladies her own age and too mature for the girls new to court, so she and the queen spent much of their time together. At parties, Sigyn danced with the married gentlemen who knew her father or socialized with the older matrons who were too old to play at flirtation, being Frigga's companion when Odin was away or socializing with his council and generals._

_Thor was mostly away from the palace; fighting battles, leading troops, and engaging in revelry. Loki spent most of his time out of the palace in search of new books and new magic, traveling across the whole of Asgard at times in search of what he wanted. Sigyn didn't meet him again until Thor's birthday celebration, several weeks after she had moved into the palace._

######################################

"I am King, and you are my wife. That makes you Queen."

"The throne is not my place." Sigyn smiled sadly. "The actions of another might dictate my title, but not my place. A rose by another name..."

"Would still be my queen..." Loki looked down at the girl again. "You think the Lady Freya would be a more suitable queen?"

"That is Freya?" Sigyn suddenly felt very small. She had heard of Freya. She was gifted in battle, said to be loved by most of the court already, and was the odds on favorite to marry well above her.

"You didn't know?"

Sigyn glanced away. "I do not know any of the new faces."

"Well," Loki sighed. "I'll still not have her as my queen." He gave her a smile that, once upon a time, had made her heart skip a beat.

Sigyn stared at the smile for a moment. Then she stood and walked out with all the grace she could muster. She couldn't look at that smile right now. She knew the time was fast approaching when she would have to act.

#######################################################

Staring at the small bracelet in her hand, Sigyn looked around her chambers. With a blink, her actions were hidden from any and all forms of vision of her. She picked up the hard bangle bracelet and, holding between the thumb and forefingers of both her hands, flexed it down. It resisted for a moment then, with a slight glow, it cracked along an invisible seal, and fell in two half moons on her palms.

She bit her lower lip, carefully placing one half to curve over the top of her wrist. Then, she slid the other half under her wrist until the hard metal circled the narrow bones. It glowed again, and was locked into place. It was oval shaped, to fit her wrist well, and was small enough that it would not slide over her hand. The hard band was silver, with out a nick or smudge in the mirror like shine.

Suddenly, as if she had donned a suit of armor, she felt calm as a sense of finality, of purpose, filled her. The bracelet's magic was not active yet, it was only a reminder of what she had decided... But it brought her a peace she hadn't known since before Loki's first attempt on the throne.

She stood, waving away the magic that hid her, patting the pocket of her dress before leaving her rooms. It was time she started playing Loki's game.

###########################################

Loki sat in the King's quarters, long fingers tapping his chin while he waited for the servers to set his table for the evening meal. He was eating alone, as he did most nights, rarely enjoying the dinners he spent with the court.

When there was a knock at the door, he sighed, flicking his fingers in command to one of the women. She opened the door meekly, then her posture changed suddenly, opening the door wide and stepping to the side with a bow. There was a soft female voice, and the serving woman turned, hurrying to the table.

"My Lord, The Queen requests entry."

Loki straightened, his surprise in his posture but hidden from his face. "Yes, she may come in."

Rather than wait for the girl who was now bustling towards the door, Sigyn stepped through, closing it herself. She walked towards the table, something in her demeanor different as she took the chair next to him. "May I join you?"

She was already sitting or Loki would have motioned for her to take a chair. "For dinner?" Loki was not used to being taken off guard, and Sigyn was nearly the last person he expected at his door.

"Yes, if I may?" She was calm, serene even. Loki nodded, motioning for the servers to place another setting for her. They sat in silence as they did so, the meal delivered shortly after. As soon as the prying eyes left, Sigyn began placing food on her dish.

"Why are you here?"

Sigyn motioned to his setting and Loki only lifted a brow. She spoke as she placed food on his plate. "I have made a decision. It was time I joined my husband."

Loki waved her off when she began to pour him a glass of wine. He had a high tolerance for alcohol, but Asgard wines were also stronger. He wanted as clear a head as possible when dealing with his wife. He would not have a repeat of his previous offenses on her, actions that he still felt shame over.

"Why?"

She tilted her head, looking at him from the corner of her eye as she cut her meat. "It has come to my attention that I will not be free of our union. To quote 'for several more millenia.' I do not wish to spend the rest of my life unhappy, nor do I want to continue trying to arrange your death or mine." She took a delicate bite. "So, the conclusion I have reached is..." She motioned with her fork to him and then the area around both of them.

"That you must return to me."

"That I must... Hmm." She paused, chewing thoughtfully. "I must give up for the good of others."

####################################################

Ok. What are everyone's thoughts so far?


	7. You never lose by loving

Hi everyone!

To Huginn89 : I agree, I would like to get into how Loki is doing as king, how everyone feels about him, etcetera. I'm just not sure if I can work it in well. I hope I can, but if you see some crap writing when it comes to characters other than Loki and Sigyn, please forgive me. If it is horrible I might just do a skim or it. Thanks for reviewing so many times, by the way, it is awesome! I can't tell you what she is going to do, you have to wait... :)

###############You never lose by loving. You always lose by holding back#####################

Sigyn sat at Odin's bedside, not touching him but feeding gentle tendrils of healing magic into his aura. "All-Father... I was once told that you can hear those who speak to you when you are in your sleep." Her gaze traveled over the hard bangle on her wrist.

"I would like to tell you I know what I am doing, or that I am doing the right thing." Sigyn looked out the window, not sure if she should look at Odin while she spoke. "I want to tell you that when you wake, things will be different. Your son will be better, healed of this sickness inside him."

"But I cannot promise that." Sigyn sighed. "I cannot even promise that I will be here when you wake, as your son may send me away for what I plan."

"I cannot seek your blessing, but I hope that you remember this. That you will think kindly of me if I am not here. That you will understand that I must do this." Sigyn for the first time, hesitantly settled her hand on the All-Father's elbow.

The sound of metal sliding across metal sent a chill down Sigyn's spine. Hesitantly, she looked behind her.

"What must you do, Sigyn, kill the rightful King of Asgard?" Sif stood, battle ready, sword tip mere inches from Sigyn's throat.

"Lady Sif." Sigyn lifted her hands, calmly making it clear that she had no weapon. She thought for a moment, uncertain about shouting for the guards but there was someone she could call. "Does Heimdall know you are here?"

Across the realm, Heimdall lifted his gaze from the bifrost, attuned to his name. He focused in, watching Lady Sif and Lady Sigyn.

Sif motioned with the tip of her sword, and Sigyn stood. "It doesn't matter as I am here defending the King."

Sigyn lowered her hands to her waist, clasping them in front of her belt. "Defending the king? What does Odin need defense from?"

"From you." Sif's eyes were dark, head lowered as her arm rose with the sword to keep it pointed at Sigyn's neck.

"What am I going to do, exactly? I have no weapon."

"You have magic as a weapon." Sif snorted. "You could be placing a spell that will kill Odin All-Father." Sif moved forward, placing the blade against the side of Sigyn's neck, just below her ear. She lifted her chin instinctively, and Heimdall began running for the palace calling for guards.

"Why would I harm Odin?" Sigyn's calm voice was low, trying to keep Sif from acting rashly.

"To keep your place as queen!" Sif thrust her arm, the blade slicing across an inch of her neck.

Sigyn winced, leaning away from the sword. Blood trickled down her neck, rolling over her collar bone and under the neck of her dress. The cut was small, Sif was a well trained warrior, and this wound was not intended to kill.

Sigyn forced her face to relax. "Would you like to take my place, Sif? You are betrothed to Thor and would have become queen."

"I will not have a false king on the throne, nor his traitor wife."

Sigyn smirked. "Is that a yes?"

Sif's face practically snarled. "I am not the one trying to kill the king!"

"But you do have a sword to the queen's throat." Heimdall stood in the doorway, flanked by guards. "You will back away from Her Majesty." Sif glanced at the large man, then back at Sigyn. With a growl, she sheathed her sword and took a few steps away.

The guards moved forward, but Sigyn waved them off. "Sif, I can see that you are angry." The pretty black-haired woman lifted a lip in contempt, and Sigyn only continued. "But I don't think you are angry with me."

"You have betrayed Asgard!"

Sigyn ignored Sif's outburst and waited until she finished. "Lady Sif, I have done nothing to harm Asgard. I do not want to be queen." Sigyn stepped away, picking up one of the cloths at Odin's bedside and pressing against the cut on her neck. "You should have been queen. I do not dispute that." Then she paused. "But that was before. What is her name? Jane something?"

"Jane Foster." Loki's voice echoed in the hall and for a moment, everyone went still. "Thor chose to remain on Midgard with her. He will likely live there until her death. That leaves Asgard without a king for at least six decades."

Sif turned on him now, her anger redirecting off of Sigyn. "That does not make you king!"

"Nor does your betrothal make you queen." Loki's voice was cold, his eyes taking in the scene with cold precision. "Why have you not arrested her? Her attack on the queen constitutes execution." He looked at the guards who glanced at Sigyn.

"My Lady Queen stopped them." Heimdall nodded to her.

"My Lord." Sigyn curtsied, then met his eyes. "I would like to deal with this. I'm sure you have more important matters to attend."

Loki smiled, looking much like a predator suddenly. "Nothing is more important than handling the person spilling my wife's blood."

Sigyn walked carefully across the floor, her body language subtly influencing Loki to walk next to her. Before he really knew what was going on, they were at the doorway. "As it is my blood, My Lord, I will handle Lady Sif."

She smiled winningly, and Loki found himself in the position of having to choose; leave and maintain his dignity or stay and make a scene that would question his authority. Allowing her to take control would make it seem as though he was only delegating, and Sigyn had been very friendly lately; usurping her control in this situation might make her angry with him. So he left. But he spoke with the guard outside, commanding that he notify him as soon as Sif was placed in a cell.

Sigyn watched Loki walk down the hall, knowing he would probably start watching them magically once he reached his quarters. Turning, she motioned to Sif, and the guards. She thanked Heimdall with a few words and a hand on his elbow. He nodded, following them until he took a different hall to return to his post while they continued below to the dungeon.

When Sif was placed in a cell not unlike the one Loki had been placed in, Sigyn dismissed the guards. Sif watched her with malice in her eyes as she cast a spell protecting them from prying eyes. Sigyn made a chair appear with a twist of her wrist and sat down outside Sif's cell, crossing her ankles.

"Sif, I would like you to speak your mind and I would like to speak my own."

Sif was silent, stalking the cell with long strides. "I have made my opinion clear."

Sigyn nodded. "Then let me make myself clear."

"You and I are very similar. You love Thor as I had loved Loki, we have known the princes and each other since childhood, and we were raised in the palace and court. Despite what you and others believe, I have always been loyal to Asgard."

"Then let me out and renounce the throne!" Sif's shout echoed down the hall.

Sigyn chuckled. "You think my renouncing the title of queen would be useful? Or even successful? Loki won't allow it." Sif started to speak but Sigyn silenced her. "He would still be king. As I understand it, he is to what you object, not me."

Sif nodded. "He is not the rightful King!"

"Who is?" Sigyn stared at Sif, a hardness in her eyes that had not been there when Sif last saw her, before Loki's betrayal and her self imposed exile.

"Odin!"

Sigyn shook her head. "He is deep in Odin-sleep, hardly capable of making decisions. My Lady Frigga died and cannot assume his reign." Sigyn paused, sadness filling her, before she tried to shake it off. "Who else?"

"Then," Sif spluttered. "Then Thor should be king."

Sigyn's eyes were sad when she met the gaze of the other woman. "I am sorry, Sif. I am sorry that you love him and Thor loves the mortal. A broken heart hurts. Waiting for your love, while he loves another... We are similar again. Loki loves another more than he loves me. He loves the throne."

Sigyn smiled sadly. "What was it that Thor said? A poisonous dream..." She shifted, standing next to the golden barrier. "Loki is filled with madness. A sickness. We have all seen what happens when he is thwarted. He comes back again with a more venomous plan and more people suffer."

"What am I to do?" Sif's eyes were dark. "Allow him to keep his ill gotten gains?"

"No. Allow me to try and... Let me try."

Sif arched an eyebrow. "You have a plan? You would betray your husband?"

"I will not betray my husband, but I do have a plan." Sigyn glanced at her chair and it vanished like smoke. "I would ask your silence on this. If you like, I will send your friends to you. Volstagg, Hogun, and Fandral?"

"You said 'had' loved him. Do you no longer love Loki?" Sif watched Sigyn's face carefully, looking for deception, for emotion that might tell her what was going on.

Sigyn's mouth twitched. "Loki is not the man I once loved. His ambition has poisoned every part of him, including our love." Sigyn moved down the steps slowly. "Some things can't survive that."

"Release me, I could help you." Sif placed her hands on the barrier.

"Loki would kill you. This is the safest place right now."

################################################

Loki flung open the heavy wooden door leading into the royal sitting room. "You are protecting Sif." His anger made the room nearly throb as his feet thudded heavily on the wooden floor.

He found her sitting calmly in a plush chair on the second floor in front of a painting of his mother, her hands flipping through a well worn book.

"Yes." She didn't look up at him from the pages. "I will not allow you to kill her."

"YOU are my wife and will obey me. Lift your protection!" Loki's voice thundered, echoing in the chill air.

There was a silence, seeming to stretch the distance between them and last forever. Then she looked up. "I cried so hard the night that you left. In this very room, I begged you to stay."

#################Song 1#########################

"_Why have you not brought Thor home?" Sigyn stood on the other side of the room, watching him as he reclined in his chair._

"_All-Father's last command was to banish him. You would have me go against Odin?" Loki's voice was smooth, using the excuse he had used on Sif and the warriors three. He turned, opening his arms to her, expecting her to join him by sitting on his lap as usual._

_She did not. "I would have you reunite your family. His presence would comfort your mother. Having the heir on the throne would comfort the court."_

_Settling into the broad leather and wood, he looked at her from under his brows. "**I** am the heir now. **I** will be all the king that Frigga and the court require."_

"_Your mother does not need a king right now..." Moving across the floor, her skirts brushing the floor silently, Sigyn placed her palm on his shoulder. "She needs her sons."_

"_Son."_

_Sigyn's brows furrowed. "What?"_

_Loki's expression was dark. "I am not Odin's son, remember? Thus Frigga is not my mother." He lifted his hand to rub at his chin. "Once again, Thor is the only one worth anything to anyone. Even to you." He jerked his shoulder, dislodging her hand._

_She sighed. Then, running her hand down his arm, she knelt at his side, both her hands cupping his one. "Thor is Odin's son, not Frigga's. Family is more than blood. Thor is "_

"_Thor is as fit to be a king as I am to be a golden retriever!" Loki's shout made her wince._

"_I don't care who is king, Loki! I want my husband back." Sigyn stood, whirling away in a froth of skirts and anger. "I want to go home!"_

"_Sigyn, this is our home now. I suggest you get comfortable in the royal quarters." Loki stood, brushing past her._

_She caught his sleeve. "Please... Whatever you are doing, stop. Did I do something wrong? Have I not been a good wife to you?"_

_Loki looked at her again, clinging to his arm like a kitten caught in his sleeve. She was begging him, tears hovering behind her eyes. "My love, you didn't do anything wrong." He gently loosened her fingers before brushing her grip away from his sleeve. "This is something that I have to do."_

_He walked away, leaving her in the sitting room, choosing to ignore the tears that started slipping silently down her cheeks._

###########################################

"Then, when I was lying under your mother's hands, as she healed me, I begged for release. When you were imprisoned, both your mother and I begged Odin for your reprieve." Sigyn stood gracefully, carefully placing the book on the small table nearby. "That is a lot of begging for you."

When she turned, something flashed under her sleeve and for a moment it caught Loki's attention before he dismissed it as jewelry. "All you do is command and order, expecting all to bow to your whims, thinking nothing of others."

She met his eyes, her's glinting hard and metallic. "I think it is time that you begged."

Loki's eyes narrowed, his face tight. "I do not beg."

"Then there is nothing left to discuss on the matter of Sif." She smiled casually, somehow brushing aside what they had been talking about and moving on. "Where shall we have dinner tonight, with the court or in our quarters?"

Loki blinked, his mind furious and whirling, angry with hr and trying to keep up at the same time.

#########################################

They ended up eating in their quarters, a simple meal. It was spent in silence as Sigyn refused to discuss Sif's execution and Loki refused to discuss anything else. Loki drank wine to complement the simple fare. By the time they had both finished, he was tired, either from boredom or from holding himself in check. He retired for the evening with a bow and a sneer in her direction.

His bed felt particularly soft, his lids especially heavy, once he settled under his blankets. When he fell asleep it was a deep dreamless sleep, the kind brought on by drugs and magic. He slept when Sigyn entered his room, still and unawakened when she picked up his wrist.

Pulling another bangle from the pocket of her nightgown, she broke it in half, slipping it over his wrist. It matched hers, only larger to accommodate him. As it sealed, she whispered the final spell, a chill washing over her at what she had done.

She slipped silently back to her rooms, locking the doors.

################################################

Song 1: I was listening to the song "Say Please" by Saving Jane when I wrote the flashback. I love it, it is such a great song.

Let me know what you think!


	8. To love is to risk

Hi everyone. Sorry this took so long but I got caught up in some original work and they took Thor off Netflix. Now I have to get up and put the disk in when I need inspiration, which is somewhat of a hassle when I have my writing nest(Laptop, snacks, water, controllers, and blankets) all set up. I also then have to take out my workout disk. And I'm lazy. I cannot wait until Thor 2 comes out on disk so I can play that on loop for more inspiration.

###################To love is to risk not being loved in return#########################

_In the darkness, the water of the lake broke into ripples, barely visible in the moonlight. A masculine body had slipped into the water, waist deep, it beckoned to someone on shore. A curvy body, female, was silhouetted through a gauzy fabric. She approached the edge of the water, but still didn't go further than her ankles._

"_Loki!" Sigyn's whisper was harsh as it floated on the water. "If we get caught I'm going to tell your mother it was all your idea... That you enchanted me."_

_He laughed. Climbing out of the water a few feet, clad only in a dripping wet loincloth, he held out his hand again. Meeting her eyes, he coaxed her with only a look. She sighed with a trusting smile, putting her hand in his, the back star-sapphire and diamonds of her betrothal ring catching the moonlight._

_He backed into the water, holding her hand in his, his wicked smile firmly in place. Once they were waist deep, he pulled her into his arms. Kissing her softly on the nose, he crouched, wetting them both to the neck while Sigyn hissed at the sudden cool water._

"_Loki," His name was a sigh across her lips, and he nuzzled her cheek in response. "Why have you brought me here?_

_Pressing his forehead to hers, cupping a cheek in his hand, he met her eyes from only inches away. It was an unspoken rule that Loki used when he wanted to assure her that he was not using any trickery. He always told her the truth, but he was still mischievous, and would use his words and magic without thought. He had to concentrate on honesty, so he met her eyes to prove his seriousness. "I have missed you."_

_Brushing a soft kiss over his mouth, she grinned. "I have seen you every day for the past month."_

"_Not alone." He kissed her again, softly, the cool water letting him hide his ardor in favor of gentleness. "You have been too busy since the betrothal. Too many nosy courtiers."_

_Brushing a strand of wet hair off his forehead, she laughed. "What did you think would happen when we announced that we would wed?"_

_Shortly after his display at the feast, claiming her dances for the foreseeable future, he gave her the ring. Sigyn had agreed and almost instantly a whirl wind of royal wedding planning and announcements and parties had begun._

_His smirk was devilish as he squeezed her to him. "I thought we would be able to touch in public, wed swiftly, and bed slowly."_

"_Slowly?" Her eyes twinkled up at him. Their past secret meetings had not led her to believe he would have patience when taking her to his bed. He always seemed frantic despite their agreement to wait for completion until after they were wed._

"_Yes." His hand traveled down her body, the wet fabric like nothing between them. "Once you are mine, I have no reason to rush. I could keep you in my bed for days and no one would deny it as my right." Slipping her thigh over his hip, he pulled her against his arousal. "I hate that we must hurry to not be caught, quickly return before anyone notices our absence, always be careful of where we touch and the clothes we remove."_

_He kissed her, stifling a groan as she flexed to settle herself more securely against him. "Perhaps we can go slowly AFTER I have had you once."_

_Her laugh echoed over the lake. He released her for fear of taking her to the shore and having her then and there. "Come, I would show you another portal."_

_She laughed, wiping water from her face. "How do you find these places?"_

_His bare shoulder rose from the water in a shrug. "My endless curiosity and willingness to break rules, with perhaps a little magic to guide the way."_

"_Where does this one lead?"_

"_I do not know. One of the nine realms I imagine."_

#############################################

Loki woke slowly, the soft sheet wrapped over his naked waist, tangled from sleep. Rubbing a hand over his brow he wondered why he had dreamed of that night, only to be distracted by a glint above him. Bringing it into focus he was surprised to find a hard bracelet circling his wrist. When he tried to remove it there was no clasp and it didn't fit over his hand.

Brow creasing in confusion, he tugged at it harder, then with a sound of frustration, used his magic. Only to have shocks tingle his fingers. Loki now glared at the offending band. Wielding stronger magic, he forced spell work to coil around the band, only to be shocked so hard his entire arm went numb, the magic dissipating. Hissing in anger, he slid out of bed and quickly pulled on his clothing, shouting for the servants.

After questioning all of the regular servants, he came to the conclusion that none of them had seen anyone enter or exit his quarters. He told no one about the bracelet, only questioning them on what they had seen that evening. Which left one person. His wife. The perfidious witch.

He sent them away, waiting until he was sure they were gone before stalking to the door connecting the king and queen's chambers. Wrenching the doors open with enough force to partially pull the handles from their place, he jerked the blankets off of her sleeping form.

Watching as the sudden movement and cold air struck her, making her gasp and shiver, sitting up suddenly, he ignored the urge to climb into the bed with her. She was dressed in a silk and lace nightgown that had hitched itself up to her thighs, looking completely innocent of any treachery.

But he steeled himself. It was becoming clear that she had learned much while he was away, and not just of deception. If she was responsible for this magic, then her power had grown extensivly.

"Did you place this on me?" Loki's voice was hard, sharp, and angry as he held up his wrist, the white metal glinting in the light from the rising sun that streamed through her windows. He watched her face closely as her anger at being woken so suddenly transformed; her expression changing from confusion, shame, fear, and worry. Finally she settled on composed, as if she was resigned to what she had done and was now unflappable.

He caught sight of a matching bracelet on her own left wrist and he glared at her. When she said nothing, a icy feeling washed over him, a small pit of fear settling in his chest. His voice was cold now. "What have you done?!"

"You know what I have done. I can see it on your face." Sigyn slithered out of bed, and Loki's anger kept him from acting on the way her soft skin slid over the silk sheets. She walked a few steps picking up a robe that she draped around her and slid her feet into embroidered slippers.

"You have bound our life force!" Loki's skin shivered, not from the cool air, but from the implication of what she had done. When she nodded at his words, confirming his worst fear, he roared in outrage, nearly spitting as he spun away from her. He brought his hands down on a wooden side table, cracking it in half and sending it and the items on it crashing to the floor. He turned again, murderous intent on his face, and suddenly a yawning pit opened inside of him, fear spilling out.

He was feeling her fear. It was so startling, so sudden, that he staggered. She had bound them, body and soul. What happened to one would happen to the other, including any intense emotions. His hand clenched and unclenched, knowing now that he could do nothing to her. Any physical harm that came to her would be inflicted on him as well... Hell, he couldn't even make her cry without making himself do the same.

His shoulders slumped as suddenly as his anger had risen. "Why?"

She turned away from him, the fear subsiding in them both and he felt a hint of guilt echo through him. Her guilt. "I couldn't do anything else. It was the only thing I could think of to make you realize what you have done."

"My high and might wife thinks to punish me?" His tone was bitter, snotty even, as he taunted her. "Let me remind you who is your husband and king!" Loki stormed to the doors leading to the hall, calling for the guards.

When they arrived, he met her eyes, a wicked smile curving his lips as he held her gaze. And ordered the guards to arrest her. She would be placed in the dungeon, where he had stayed,and he would visit her as often as she had visited him.

####################################################

Sif sat in her cell, awake despite the early hour. A warrior rose with the sun, even if there was no sun to be seen in this dark place. It seemed that Loki had forgotten her, and Sigyn had arranged for her to be released, though she knew not when. Her excitement another reason for her early rise. The warriors three would be coming for her soon.

When there was a commotion, Sif stood, watching the entrance. Guards were escorting someone in, Volstagg, Hogun, and Fandral following behind. They seemed to be the source of the commotion, all of them jockeying for positions talking to the guards. Shouting really. And then she saw why.

Flanked by guards, Sigyn was being marched down the long cold hall of criminals. She was in her nightgown and barefoot, obviously having been pulled from bed. The guards stopped in front of her cell and lowered the magical field keeping her in place.

"Lady Sif, you are released." The guard motioned for her to exit the cell and Volstagg's voice rose, standing out from the general din that was being created by the inmates.

"What is the meaning of this? Why is the queen being locked up down here?" The warriors three had visited her enough that she was able to tell them that Sigyn had some sort of plan, something that would help. Volstagg had a special connection to Sigyn as well. He had wanted to court her, but then Loki had stepped in, before he even had a chance.

"The king's orders. Step aside." The guard forced the big man back, and Fandral whispered furtivly in his ear. With a disgruntled expression, Volstagg finally stood down.

Sif walked slowly down the white stone steps, her eyes meeting Sigyn's. Reaching out, despite the guards trying to stop her, she laid a hand on the other woman's forearm. "Will you be alright?"

It was a loaded question; should Sif try to save Sigyn, what had happened to cause this, and was Loki going to kill his wife were the top three rolling around their heads. Sign shook her head with a small smile. "I will be fine. Thank you for your concern Lady Sif. Be well in your freedom."

Sigyn straightened her spine, shaking off the guards hands with the imperious motion, and walked freely into the cell. She turned as the light barrier formed, and Sif waited on the lowest step. "Shall I bring you some clothing, My Lady?"

Sif voice was respectful towards Sigyn for the first time. She had spoken the truth when she said she had a plan, and it appeared that Loki had caught her in it. Sigyn nodded. "Yes, thank you." She paused, then added, "Do not worry, Sif, I knew what I was doing and am prepared to face the consequences."

Sif nodded and allowed her friends to take her away. When she came back to drop off clothes, the guards wouldn't let them see the queen, only promising to take the items to her.

###########################################

Loki prowled his chamber like a caged animal. He was unfit for company and had been turning away royal meetings and councils, eschewing the parties and court activities. He was tormented by his own feelings of guilt at locking Sigyn away in the dungeon, and her feelings of despair and loss pounded at him as well.

His quarters had suffered, his magic lashing out as often as he did physically. Many of the decorations had broken and been removed, the walls bore the marks of his anger.

He had called on every healer and magic user within the city, none knew of the spell she had used or how to undo it. Most barely spoke to him, and even if they knew something he wondered if they would have told him.

But he had learned more about bonding than he had ever known. Any physical harm done to the caster would result in the same injury to the victim, and if the victim was the one who inflicted the injury, it would rebound with ten times the force.

His face contorted in a snarl, vowing to be free of this new shackle, and when he was, Sigyn would pay.


	9. The weak can never forgive

Thanks to everyone who reviewed!

Huginn89: So glad you like this. I hope the trick was good enough. I was trying to tie in the fact that in the Comic-verse, Loki and Sigyn were actually shackled together with a length of chain by Odin, but that was going to be impossible to write and at that point Loki had no motivation to not just kill her.

XXRoweenaJAugustineXx: Glad you found your way here. Thanks, I try to keep things simple in terms of story telling otherwise it gets too tedious to write and I have to keep tons of notes about how things link together. Hopefully then next bit doesn't get too confusing. It has to be a little bit right now in order to get to the next step, but then things should get simple again. Well... As simple as things can get with Loki. :)

############The weak can never forgive. That is an attribute of the strong###################

Ten months... Sigyn spent almost a year in the cell below ground while Loki searched for someone who could remove the hard bangle that made him feel her pain and sorrows. In that time Sif, the warriors three, and several others staged a few rebellions. But Loki was smart and sly, he had enough of the court on his side that the upheaval never lasted long. By keeping the upper class happy, while the lower class lifestyle remained the same, there were few willing to upset the status quo for an uncertain future.

Eventually even those warriors were forced to a grumbling acceptance of Loki, the improvements he had made and his actions as king earning a modicum of esteem. Though not many were aware exactly how he came to power, those that were still viewed him with disdain.

Nearly all cast disapproving glances at him for what he had done to Sigyn, though no one ever said anything openly... Except Sif. Sif had spread word that she had never been accomplice to his actions and even Loki was shocked at how quickly public opinion had turned in Sigyn's favor. She had become something of a martyr in the eyes of Asgardians, sacrificing herself to save them from whatever threat he presented. Nearly all of his good work was attributed to her influence on him. He sensed that Sif would stab him given half a chance, just on principle.

There was a powerful link between Loki and Sigyn through their bracelets, that was only intensified by the connection they had already. When she refused food over some policy or decree, he lost weight. When he tried to have her sent away from the capitol city, he felt like his body was being split in half, hardly able to stand until she was brought back. He tried to cut off her source of information, and found himself deaf thanks to her fury, and also found that there were many loyal to him. He was incapable of having anything done to her, other than being locked below. Several sorcerers came to the castle and none were able to remove the bangle. Most were afraid to try.

Loki eventually settled into a rhythm. Sometimes he hated Sigyn, sometimes he wanted her dead, but most of the time he just wanted her near. He had a long time to think, and he knew that she had once brought him peace. A peace he couldn't find no matter how he tried. When he had things sent to her, messages from others or books to pass the time, he could feel a sliver of the calm energy flow through him, but nothing was a balm to his inner turmoil like her presence had been. But he never sent her anything from him. It was always under the guise of another.

He felt her growing depression, knew of her activities via weekly reports(edited by her supporters and supplemented by his) from the prison, and on the rare occasion that he was injured by either accident or assassination attempt, he knew healers had to visit her cell. Things were... settled. Neither happy nor peaceful, but lacking chaos.

Until a small book found it's way to his desk. Supposedly sent to him from one of the libraries where he had dispatched scouts, looking for a solution to the bond, the book was mostly incomprehensible. Irrelevant to his needs. With the exception of one page. The scout had marked it and tucked a Monk's translation in on another piece of paper.

Loki was surprised and had actually let the book sit unopened for several days. He had stopped actively searching for a solution and now one dropped into his lap? It was suspicious.

It spoke of a spell to bind two people. Forged in the fires of fear for one and the ashes of love, the bangles were made of a broken heart. And 'could only be removed by the one who placed it, and only when the broken heart was sealed.' There was also a phrase about a 'most valued' gift that had to be given.

Slamming the book shut, Loki roughly tugged at his hair. "What does that mean?" The empty room echoed his words back to him and he unconsciously reached for the bond. He had learned how to do that only a short while ago, to find temporary solace in knowing that she was as bound to him as he was to her. He could tug on the fragile connection and feel something tug back. It gave him momentary comfort when he was troubled, but nothing that lasted more than a few minutes. And it wasn't peace.

He had kept his dark promise to never visit her, but his violent anger had abated. Loki would never say he approved of her actions but after long conferences with Volsp, he could understand why she had done it. Why she thought it was her only option. Though he disagreed, it had been a good plan.

It had been nearly six months since the last rebellion, and Loki had changed. Even Sif, Heimdall, and the others had only one constant complaint. Sigyn's release. It was a harping point that they brought to him at least once a month and he always refused. Perhaps the next time they came it would be time to grant the request.

He wanted the bangle removed, and since she was the one who placed it, he knew that she would have to be the one who removed it. Probably willingly. And he doubted she would be willing to acquiesce to any of his requests unless he made nice.

He sent for Volsp. Perhaps the seer could decode more of the spell.

#############################################

Volsp sat at Loki's table waiting for the king to ask him the question that had brought the seer here. He had been respectful but silent, not wanting to influence the man towards his destiny or away from it. His job today was not to guide, but to make the choices clear.

Loki had grown in many ways. Not nearly as bitter as he had been, he was making decisions for the right reasons rather than spite. He held power around him like a cloak rather than an armor, and wielded it less like a sword and more like a staff. Less aggressive and defensive.

Volsp and Sigyn had discussed when the right time to give Loki clues would be, and he felt that the time was rapidly approaching. Now to get Sigyn out of the dungeon and back into Loki's sights.

Finally Loki spoke. "I found this." He showed Volsp the book, sliding it and the translation across the smooth surface of the table. "Will this break the bond that Sigyn created?"

Volsp was silent as he looked over the page. "The bond cannot be broken. It can be removed, but not broken."

Loki sighed. "Will this remove it, then?"

Volsp smirked, a boldness only capable because Loki needed him. "This paper can do nothing. Only your actions, how you interpret the words, will accomplish anything."

Green eyes pinned the older man in a hard but tolerant stare. "You know more than you are telling me."

Volsp nodded. "If I were to tell you everything I know, we would not leave this room for many years."

Loki sighed, and sat back with his hand to his chin. His thoughtfulness proved how he had changed, and his words held wisdom when he spoke again. "Very well, then tell me something that I do not know, but should."

Volsp nodded. "Very good, My Lord." He thought for a moment, closing the book and sliding it across the table. " But first I would remind you to think of the prophecy I gave you, and that this has not been your only help." This was the book he tapped with a long finger.

When Loki nodded, Volsp continued. "To be deeply loved gives you strength and to love deeply gives you courage. You must find what you lack, strength or courage."

Volsp stood and bowed slightly, and after a moment Loki dismissed him with a hand movement. He had much to think about and much to do. Standing he quickly ordered the queen's chambers cleaned and readied. Girding himself for what he expected to be a furious wife, he strode out of his chambers with a grimace locked on his face.

#####################################################

Sigyn sat unknowingly in much the same position the Loki had during his occupation of the same cell. Her back to the wall, bottom on the floor, book in hand. It was forgotten though, as Sif and Fandral sat outside her cell.

"How are you, My Lady?" Fandral's voice was concerned. It always was and Sigyn had to smile.

"I am fine, Fandral. I believe I may finally catch up on my reading." She chuckled lightly. "My cage is quite gilded at the moment." It was true. When she had first arrived the cell had been mostly bare.

Now, a stack of books, a tumbling mountain of pages, sat unsteadily in a corner. Soft satin and fur pillows and blankets were strewn about, and she had been brought much of her closet, allowing her to dress herself in more comfortable clothing. Even her bed had been replaced with a dark wood sleigh bed and was well adorned.

Sif and Fandral traded repressed glances. Sigyn was always cheerful when they visited, but it didn't take a genius to see that her eyes had been steadily loosing their spark. Her silver gaze had turned the color of gray ash, darker, muted, and without the shine of her personality. "We will request your release again this week..." Sif tried to sound positive, but even the woman in prison could tell there wasn't much hope.

Brushing invisible lint off her dove grey skirts, she tucked a strand of hair behind her ear then marked her place with a scrap of paper, setting the book aside. "It is alright Sif. Can we talk of something other than a freedom that is unlikely to come?"

A warm voice echoed down the hall. "It might be coming sooner than you think, My Queen." Volsp walked slowly from the entrance, waiting to say more until he stood next to a sitting Sif. "I have just come from an audience with your husband. I expect that the next time Sif petitions for your freedom, it will be granted."

Sif stood with a broad smile. "Then I will request it immediately!"

Sigyn shook her head. "No Sif. He needs to admit it to himself. There will be no more petitions for freedom."

Sif's shoulders drooped slightly in confused defeat. "But, my Lady, please..."

Sigyn waved a hand, getting to her feet stiffly. "No. No one will request my freedom. Spread the word."

Fandral blinked at her, more accepting of her order but still confused. "Won't you tell us why?" Sif would never rest otherwise and would pace for weeks, driving the rest of them mad with her ranting.

Sigyn set her book on a small table, and with a flick of her fingers, a cup of tea appeared in her hands. "Loki has not done anything for me of his own desire. He needs to make the decision. Not acquiesce to demands of others." Her eyes met Volsp's and a silent communication passed, a nearly imperceptible nod.

The plan would only work if Loki could somehow, even unconsciously, admit that his own actions were wrong and that he could forgive her. She needed that crack in him, or she would never reach the old Loki.

She sipped the tea and met Sif's eyes. "He has to do it on his own."

Sif glared at her, her nose flaring and eyes narrowed, but eventually nodded. "Alright. I will say nothing."

####################################################

But she would glower hard enough to set Loki's hair on fire. If she could. Sif glared at Loki at public events, dinners, audiences, and in passing. And it was getting to him. He would meet her gaze and his face would darken. When he couldn't see her, he would look around, feeling her eyes on him.

Now she stood in the large chamber, her friends at her back while Loki questioned her.

"... forged something of a truce. I would be very upset to find that you are planning to kill me Sif. Tell me that is not the case?" Loki sat, dressed for the role, legs splayed on his golden throne.

"I am not." Sif's teeth grit tightly, but she didn't even try to smile.

"Why have you been..." He waved his hand slightly, in a very small motion. "Acting suspiciously?"

Sif was silent and felt Fandral turn slightly behind her, delivering a discreet but hard elbow to his lower back. She grimaced and forced herself to soften her tone when she spoke. "I have been to see Sigyn, is all my lord. I am sure you are aware of my feelings on the subject."

Fandral immediately gripped one of her shoulders, his hand hard as he took a step forward. She was toeing the line of what their queen had commanded. "She only means that... well..."

Hogun grumbled at Fandral's sudden lack of ability with words. "Sif is angry over the lack of game found on our hunts recently, Your Majesty, that is all."

Loki's bright eyes narrowed. They were all behaving oddly, even Volstagg, who was ducking his head and casually inspecting the toe of his boots. Fandral's lack of skill in a usually talkative mouth. Hogun speaking without obvious reason. Sif holding her tongue on the topic of Sigyn...

He settled his back against the chair more firmly, confident he was close to the problem. Now he would be able to see Sigyn. "Would you like to request that I release my queen?" He smirked. "I would be happy to..."

"No." Sif interrupted him, making Loki's eyes widen in shock, at both her refusal and her breach of protocol. She continued in a firm voice through tightly clenched teeth. "No, my lord. I do not request Lady's Sigyn's release." She was so stiff Loki was certain a soft breeze would have cracked her spine.

Suddenly confused, he stared at her hard, standing. "You do not want me to grant Sigyn's freedom?"

Sif seemed to change colors as different expressions flashed over he face. She would not have done well as queen if Thor had taken her to wife. She had no ability to hide her thoughts, something essential if she was to command the court. Finally, Fandral was the one to speak. "We do not..." He gripped Sif's wrist tightly when she inhaled as if to speak, and it somehow stopped her. "We do not request the queen's freedom today, King Loki."

Loki watched them carefully. Their requests were practically routine, and yet for some reason were unwilling to ask today. Even with him hinting very strongly that he would finally grant the request. Why?

"Why?" Loki carefully walked down the tall stairs, stopping a few feet in front of them.

They glanced amongst themselves, confirming his suspicions that something was going on, something that was preventing them from asking for her freedom. "Is there a threat against Sigyn? Is that why you will not ask for her freedom, when you all want her released?"

"No, my lord." Sif could barely speak though thin lips. "There is no threat against the queen. We do not ask you to release Lady Sigyn."

Loki's own lips thinned. There was definitely something going on.

#############################################################

No one would ask for Sigyn's freedom. Loki paced the living space of his quarters, boot heels thudding heavily against the stone floors. Not one single person would ask him to free the queen. He growled. The only way to be released from the bond was to get her out of the dungeon.

Slamming a hand down on the table, he slouched into the chair, his posture defeated. Taking a deep breath, hating what he was about to do, he pulled himself together. If no one would ask, he would have to do it himself.


End file.
